Secrets Best Kept Silent
by Poison Wasteland
Summary: What happens when you mix together a drug addicted boyfriend, abusive father, and a huge crush on your History teacher? You get a teenage boy named Roxas. But what is he going to do when his club jumper of a cousin enters the picture? AkuRoku, RoRi, other
1. Chapter 1

Warnings: Yaoi, Drug/ parental abuse, later rape, mild language

Disclaimer: We do not own any of the characters in this story.

Summary: What happens when you mix together a drug addicted boyfriend, an abusive father, and a huge crush on your History teacher? You get a teenage boy named Roxas. Not only is Roxas' life difficult, but what is he going to do when his club jumper of a cousin enters the picture?

* * *

It was early. The sun had yet to come up and Riku sat on his bed, his legs crossed and a mirror in his lap. He dumped out some of the white powder in the bag he held lovingly in his hand, making sure none of it missed the smooth surface. He quickly closed the bag and gently put it down on the nightstand. Almost automatically he ran the razor through the pile, spreading it out and breaking up any pieces and separating it into four straight lines. He had done this so much that he barely even thought about what he was doing, just thinking about what was to come.

He rolled up a five, nice and tight, and tipped his head down to the lines. When he was finished he could feel the familiar tingling in his nose, almost a burning sensation and smiled. He leaned back, as his mind cleared and the familiar rush pumped through his veins and sighed. Time to wake up, Roxas.

* * *

Roxas rolled over in bed, the buzzing of his phone in his ear and the glaring of sunlight in his eyes. Glancing at the clock, he realized it was 6:22. Class started in less than an hour. Roxas groaned as he reached over his bedside table and grabbed his phone. He quickly flipped open the text from Riku.

_"Mornin Rox. Time to wake up. I'll be there to pick you up in twenty."_

He texted back a short reply before rolling out of the warmth of his bed and into the cold air. He stretched, scratching the back of his head, before grabbing a towel and heading for the shower. Ten minutes later and he could hear the yelling of his mother over the pounding water.

"Roxas! Riku's here!" Roxas' mom called as she let the boy in. "Morning, Riku. I think he's in the shower. Why don't you grab something to eat in the kitchen while you wait?" Roxas' mom smiled as Riku nodded and followed her into the house. He went with her into the kitchen where she proceeded to grab him a bowl of cereal. She gave him a welcoming smile as she placed it into his hands.

"Thank you, Elena." Riku took the bowl with gratitude and grabbed a chair from the kitchen table. As Riku finished the bowl of cereal, footsteps were heard pounding down the stairs. A very irritated Roxas appeared from the hallway, scowling in Riku's direction. Riku smirked.

"Well, aren't you just happy to see me?" Riku chuckled, walking over to Roxas and planting a kiss on his cheek.

"You're early," the teen said, making his bowl of cereal and scarfing it down as quickly as possible, looking at the clock on the stove nearby.

"By what? Two minutes?" Riku laughed lightly, ruffling Roxas' still wet hair, getting droplets everywhere. Roxas just grumbled something, shoving more cereal into his mouth. Riku sighed, shook his head. "Well, hurry up, or we'll be late."

Twenty more minutes and a quick coffee stop later and Riku's car was pulling into the school's parking lot. Riku turned the car off and turned to look at the sour blonde. Roxas sat sipping his coffee, packed with obscene amounts of sugar in hopes of further waking him up. Roxas really wasn't a morning person, and even though he hated being mean to Riku, he couldn't help being a grouch. He looked over to riku, blue meeting aqua for a moment before both smiled. "I'm sorry about-" Riku pressed his lips to the blonde's gently, quieting him.

"Don't apologize. I know how you are in the mornings. Don't worry about it." Riku shook his head when the blonde went to protest further, silencing him with another kiss.

"Riku?" Roxas asked quietly this time, looking into the eyes of his boyfriend, mild concern plain on his face. "Are you...are you high?" Riku's eyes widened, panic spreading through his body as Roxas gaped at him in disbelief. "Are you fucking serious? Riku, you said you'd stop! At least during school!" He pulled even farther from Riku, reaching for the handle to get out. "I can't believe you!"

"Roxas, stop." Riku pulled the blonde back to him, cupping his face in his hand. "Look, I'm sorry. I just... you know what its like." Roxas stared at him furious.

"I don't know what its like." His voice was hard and even, almost cold. "I don't know what its like because i don't need to do it. I'm not a fucking addict like you."

"I'm not an addict." Riku averted his eyes, shaking his head slightly. "I don't..." He let go of Roxas and turned to face the steering wheel. He sighed deeply and ran his hands through his hair. "Look, I'm coming off of it now, ok? So don't worry about it." Riku got out of the car, slamming the door behind him.

Roxas was guilty now, knowing that was a low blow for Riku who was too proud to admit he was addicted. He followed the other out of the car, being sure to gently close his door before walking around the car and wrapping his arms around the taller teen. "I'm sorry. You're right, it is ok. Everything is ok. I just... I don't like you doing those things and hurting yourself like that."

"I'm not hurting myself. I'm not stupid like everyone else, I know when to stop, okay?"

* * *

School seemed to drag as usual, thank god it was already friday and there was no homework for the blonde. Not yet at least, and it was only fourth period. He sat with his head in his hand, mindlessly doodling in his notebook as Mr. Leonhart drawled on about theorems and proofs. He never understood the purpose of geometry, sure, shapes and all, but why did you need to know insane equations just to find the length of one side of a triangle? Couldn't you just use a ruler?

He switched from doodling to simply tapping the eraser on his desk, staring at the clock while the seconds ticked by. The man at the front of the room turned to write some complicated theorem on the board, along with drawings and examples, giving enough time for a giggling Kairi to pass out twenty small, folded notes. Roxas looked curiously at the note, and, like many other students, unfolded it under his desk out of sight in case Mr. Leonhart turned and saw.

"House Party Tonight!" The note said in bright blue letters across the top. It continued to show that Kairi and Namine's parents would be out of town for the next four days, leaving them with an empty house in the small, quiet town of Destiny Islands. The twins lived in a huge beachside estate with a massive yard and very distant neighbors, so house parties were no new thing in Twilight High.

To say that the girls were loaded was an understatement. The two of them were always planning some get together or party, driving around in shiny new cars from overseas. They were supposed to attend an all girls Catholic school with uniforms and the works, but a few fluttered lashes and tears on Kairi's and a few bits of argument and silent treatments from Namine and the two of them landed themselves in public school with the rest of us.

The bell rang and all of the students scrambled out of their seats, eager to meat outside the door and ask about the party. Roxas elbowed his way through the crowd, rushing to his locker where a silver haired boy smiled, waiting for him. Roxas gave a small smile in return, turning his attention to the lock, turning it right, then left....

"So, did you hear about the new History teacher?" Riku asked, crossing his arms and leaning against the locker next to Roxas'.

"New History teacher?" his brow furrowed in a mix of concentration and confusion. before pulling the locker open and dropping his books in.

"Yeah, y'know, the one replacing Mrs. Lockheart?" Riku pushed himself off of the locker. The halls by now were clearing, most of the students rushing to their next class before the bell rang. Roxas pushed his locker shut, turning the lock a few times to make sure it was locked as the bell rang loudly overhead. "Looks like we're late to lunch, huh?" The blonde joked, turning to look up at the taller teen with a smile.

"Well, you're in a better mood, I see." Riku said lightly, smirk forming as he stepped closer to the blonde, a hand automatically going to the locker next to his head. Riku leaned in and brushed the boy's lips with his own, Roxas' breath catching at the suddenness of it.

"R-riku, we're in school." The blonde protested while Riku placed light kissed on his neck, nipping his ear slightly.

"So?" Came the whispering reply in his ear. The blonde gasped when he felt Riku bite down on his neck lightly, softly sucking the spot, leaving a hint of a mark and licking the spot gently before looking the blonde in his eyes, full smirk in place.

Roxas was a deep crimson with blush, slight shock plain on his face. "Riku," He whined, playfully shoving the laughing teen's shoulder. Riku just laughed more, stealing another kiss before turning and heading to the cafeteria, Roxas following quickly, still blushing madly. By the time he caught up, they were already at the cafeteria.

"I'm going on line. Do you want me to get you anything?" Riku looked at Roxas, waiting for a reply.

"I'm not hungry." Roxas answered. "I'm just going to sit down with the others."

"Alright, suit yourself." Riku gave Roxas a quick peck before heading towards the lunch line. As Roxas walked to his table, he noticed that everyone was already there with all their lunches. He took the end seat next to Olette.

"Hey, Roxas." she smiled sincerely. " Are you going to the twin's party? I'm sure they would love to hear you are."

"Yes, we would." the twins said simultaneously. Roxas looked behind him where the pair walked up to the table, lunch trays in hand. They giggled, calling out another simultaneous "JINX!" and more high pitched giggles.

Roxas shook his head at the two, their 'twin-synch-ness' being a normal everyday occurrence. Hayner was laughing, talking loudly about the party a few seats down. "...and i hope its not like last time, y'know, when _somebody_ had a little too much to drink..." He of course was talking about the incident when Selphie danced on the table, threatening anyone who tried to stop her by swinging a jump rope at anyone within range.

The twins sat on the opposite side of the table, pulling out more of the notes and handing handfuls out to everyone at the table. They quickly told everyone to give them out to friends or just in the classes and hallways. Riku soon joined everyone at the table, carrying his tray of pizza and fries. Roxas reached over and grabbed a few fries, Riku scowling at the intrusion. Roxas smiled broadly in return, munching quickly on the fries and sticking his tongue out at his boyfriend.

"You said you didnt want anything." Riku looked incredulously at the blonde.

"Yeah, well, they just looked so good." Roxas countered, "Besides, you love me." He finishes before sneaking a few more fries. Olette 'awed' at the exchange and Kairi and Namine burst out in their signature giggles, eliciting a light blush from the blonde. Roxas got up and stretched for a second before letting his arms go limp at his sides. "I'll be back." He turned and started for the entrance to the cafeteria, Riku calling after him before he even made it two steps away.

"Where are you going?"

"Bathroom." And with that the blonde continued out of the cafeteria and into the hall. He strolled lazily through the empty halls, his feet taking him to wherever. He turned down hall after hall, not paying attention to where he was going until he turned another corner and collided with someone. There was a harsh sound as many folders and binders and maybe a few text books crashed into the ground, their contents scattering on the floor. Not only were the supplies on the ground, but Roxas managed to be knocked off his feet, swearing a little under his breath as he hit the floor. He landed in an uncomfortable sitting position, elbows on the ground. He looked up, the beginning of an apology hanging on his tongue as he gazed up at the hand offered to him, and past that to the fierce green eyes that met his gaze.

"Sorry about that, I wasn't exactly paying attention." The man said, pulling a hidden headphone out of his ear and smiling. His smile was beautiful, but that wasn't what kept Roxas speechless. The person hovering slightly over him has a huge mane of red hair that stuck out at odd angles, but seemed slightly under control. He had pale skin and an angular face, his high cheekbones decorated with two small triangle tattoos. "The name's Axel," he beamed broader, taking Roxas' hand in his own and pulling the boy to his feet. "Got it memorized?"

The blonde stared in bewilderment, not sure if this guy was serious or not. "R-roxas." He stuttered in reply, blushing madly and continuing to stare at Axel's unusual features, not able to find any other words to say. Axel looked the blonde over just as invasively, reminding Roxas that, yes, it was impolite to stare.

Roxas knelt down and started picking up some of the strewn papers, keeping his eyes down to avoid the invasive greens, the blinding red. He felt stupid, and started to apologize for knocking all the papers out of place when a hand stopped his own. Roxas froze at the zap of electricity that he was sure came from the redhead and traveled all throughout his body, making him shiver. Slowly he looked up, eyes once again meeting the piercing greens of the other and he flushed darker than he had before.

"I said it was my fault, don't worry about it." Axel took his hand back and shuffled a few papers together and stuffed them into a folder. They were silent in the next minute of picking up the papers, Axel's hand occasionally brushing Roxas', making the boy jump every time from the shock that went with it. And it wasn't very unpleasant. By the time the last of the papers were shuffled and stuffed into a folder, Roxas face had returned to a more natural color with a pink tint instead of the full out crimson he was before.

"Thanks," Axel said standing and juggling some of the folders and binders until he got them comfortable. "Well, see ya around, kid." Axel called over his shoulder, waving a little before shuffling down the hall, this time with one of the tiny headphones swinging from his shirt collar instead of placed in his ear like before.

* * *

Author's Note: Well, we hope you guys liked the first chapter. Review and tell us what you think. Dont be scared to show a little negative feedback.


	2. Chapter 2

Warnings: Yaoi, Drug/ parental abuse, later rape, mild language

Disclaimer: We do not own any of the characters in this story.

Summary: What happens when you mix together a drug addicted boyfriend, an abusive father, and a huge crush on your History teacher? You get a teenage boy named Roxas. Not only is Roxas' life difficult, but what is he going to do when his club jumper of a cousin enters the picture?

_

* * *

_

_Who the hell...?_

Roxas was walking back to the cafeteria, the bathroom forgotten as he tried to shake off this feeling.

_Who was that guy? Axel? _

"Hey, Rox! What took ya?" Called Wakka, a look of concern plain on his features. "Did you get lost? Or did you just fall in?" Laughter erupted all around and Roxas took his seat next to Riku. The twins were busy going over party plans with Olette, and Riku was talking to Tidus and Hayner about the latest games coming up, Tidus with his Blitzball and Hayner with his struggle matches, Riku yapping away about the teams rank and what not in soccer.

"Took you long enough," Riku breathed in his ear when Roxas sat next to him, Roxas blushing and the slight shiver it gave him to have Riku's breath tickle his ear. Riku quickly nipped the ear, licking the outer shell before turning back to his conversation. Roxas sat awkwardly, between the jolts from the stranger and the shiver from his boyfriend, Roxas was very worked up.

_Why did that even happen, anyway? I've never even seen that guy before. 'Got it memorized?' What a weirdo... But still, it shouldn't have felt that...good. _

"You ok?" Riku asked when he looked over to the blonde, the boy's face contorted with confusion and some traces of distress. Riku put his hand on the boy's knee, leaning closer in. "Wanna get some air? We can go sit in the car for a few." Roxas nodded a little. It was normal for the two of them to leave the table, so no one in the group questioned it when the two of them got up, Riku taking his trash to the garbage and then leading the younger outside.

Once in the sunshine, Riku took Roxas' hand in his own and gave it a little squeeze. "So what's up? Why are you acting so weird?" Riku looked down at the boy, the sun shining off his hair and into his eyes uncomfortably.

"I'm not exactly sure." Roxas said slowly. He looked up to Riku, who smiled down at him a little worried.

"Well," Riku's voice dropped an octave as they reached his car, turning the blonde to push him up against the door, a hand on either side of the boy, their eyes locked before Riku leaned in, kissing Roxas hard for a moment, his tongue running along Roxas' bottom lip, demanding access. "Let's get your mind off of it." One of his hands tangled into blonde locks, pulling gently and eliciting a groan from the boy, Roxas biting down on Riku's lip as his arms snaked around Riku's neck and pulling him closer. Riku reached over and opened the back door of the car, pushing Roxas in and closing the door behind him. Riku was glad for tinted windows, otherwise he knew Roxas would do nothing with him on school grounds, or anywhere public for that matter. He hovered over the now smiling teen, one hand finding a way under his shirt while the other helped hold him up over his boyfriend, who was now blushing an adorable shade of pink as Riku ran his hand up the blonde's side, exposing the flesh there and grinning wickedly.

"R-riku..." Roxas gasped a little when a finger brushed over a nipple, tweaking it slightly before sliding back down the length of Roxas' frame. He pulled riku into a deep, slow kiss, their mouths opening to the other without hesitation as they explored the familiar depths within. Riku was slowly working on the buckle of Roxas' belt, pulling it open and moving on to the button, careful not to break the conduct between the two of them. Roxas groaned a minute later when he felt a hand slip past the elastic barrier of his boxers and moving to his arousal.

Riku's hand closed over Roxas' length, Roxas groaning again into their kiss, Riku smiling. Riku started a steady rhythm, Roxas' nails digging deeper into his shoulders the faster he moved, soft moans escaping his throat. Riku pulled away from the kiss, his lips closing on the blonde's neck, biting down a little harder than earlier, this time leaving more of a mark than before.

Roxas, now panting with the growing pleasure, softly calling out Riku's name every now and then. Roxas started to move his hands downs Riku's body, boldly slipping under the waist line of Riku's pants and nearing Riku's own growing member. Roxas was about to wrap a hand around it when Riku's phone started beeping and vibrating like mad, playing out a crappy version of some pop tune that one of the twins had set as their ring tone. Roxas jumped, pulling his hands back out from Riku's pants, pulling Riku's hands out in the open as well. Riku cursed under his breath, sitting uncomfortably back on Roxas' legs while the boy pulled himself up into a sitting position.

"What the hell do you want?" He muttered into the phone, eyes wide in disbelief a second later. "Shit. Are you serious?....Fuck." He hung up the phone and looked to Roxas. "The bell is about to ring, they're calling to make sure we're not late to class." He rolled his eyes, knowing the moment was ruined and couldn't be fixed now. Roxas blushed, uttered a small swear himself and looking down.

"I can't go to class like this, Riku."

"Yeah, well, neither can I." the boy growled, glaring at the phone as the bell in the school rang. "Well, now what?" He looked to Roxas, who was still blushing, still trying to catch his breath.

"I don't know." He groaned, looking to the school. He knew he couldn't skip English, but he knew he definitely couldn't go in his current condition. "I guess we're just going to have to be late."

"I guess so," Riku looked intently at Roxas with a smirk. "In that case, why don't we finish what we started?"

* * *

"Ahem, Roxas, you do know you're about a half hour late to my class, right?"

"I-I'm so s-sorry, , but I went out to lunch and we lost track of time a-and-"

"Save me your excuses for after class. Just get the notes from someone and sit down." Zexion sighed and turned back to the board. Roxas sat in his seat, face burning worse than it had the entire day.

After another fifteen minutes of lecture, the bell rang, releasing the students to move to seventh period classes. Mr. Milenko sat at his desk and stopped Roxas on his way past. He waited for the room to clear, grading a quiz or two during the wait. When the room was empty, Roxas caught a glare from one visible eye, than a shake of the head. "Roxas, I-"

"ZEXY!!" The door burst open a second later and in came Roxas' music appreciation teacher, stopping to stare at the two. "Am I interrupting something?" Mr. Miuno quickly recomposed himself, shaking off his coat while blushing a little.

"No, Demyx, its fine, really." The man sitting at the desk sighed and looked to Roxas. "Look, I don't care to know why you're late, because I have my guesses. Just don't let it happen again, ok?" Mr. Milenko shuffled some papers, placing the neat pile on his desk. "And as for you-"

"Hey, Rox, why are you getting in trouble this time?" Demyx turned to Roxas, a brow rising in question, his arms folding, and a smirk in place.

"N-nothing." Roxas looked away, shame-faced.

"Yeah, ok. What are you in trouble for?"

"Being over a half hour late." Zexion said, recording a few grades into his grade book. "And I really don't want to think of why, but I'm sure Riku is late in whatever class he has, too."

"Ooh, so it's like that, eh?" Demyx had a wicked grin as he walked over to Roxas who was definitely a deep red color, very intent on staring at his shoes. "You know, I used to do that all the time, right, Zexy?"

"Demyx-"

"We used to skip almost every day! We would go and party and do god knows what with god knows who! Oh! I loved hi-" Before Demyx could finish he had a hand over his mouth, a stern look from Zexion to complete the interjection.

"That is enough."

"Awe, c'mon, I used to babysit this kid all the time! He knows my stories! It's no big thing!" This was true, Demyx was Roxas' baby sitter back when Roxas was still in middle and grade school and Demyx was still the neighbor that was in big and scary high school.

"I-I have to get to class." Roxas said quietly while the other two still argued.

"I'll give you a pass," Zexion said sitting at his desk. "Where are you going next?"

"Mr. Aeroe's class." Roxas said quickly, wanting to be away from his childhood tormenter. Demyx turned to Roxas in horror.

"Just be glad it wasn't _his_ class you were late for. You really would've been a goner." Demyx shuddered, knowing the wrath of the mentioned man. Zexion wrote up a quick pass as Demyx started to talk about the new teacher, asking if the other had seen him yet.

"He's sooo fucking hot!"

"Language!" Zexion hissed, handing Roxas his pass

"Sorry!" Demyx clapped a hand over his mouth, looking to Roxas bewildered. Roxas just shook his head and left the class

Roxas almost ran down the halls, knowing that even with a late pass you would get in trouble for coming in even as the bell was ringing, which it was now. Roxas swore under his breath, skidding around another corner past a couple hiding in a discrete alcove and past a few teachers that called after him until they realized where he was going.

Vexen's room.

Mr. Aeroe glared smugly down his nose at the late Roxas, who was panting for breath harder than he had in the car before. Roxas kept his eyes down as he handed the pass to the teacher, silently going to his seat.

An excruciating hour of advanced placement chemistry later and Roxas found himself shuffling to his history class, hoping Ms. Lockheart would go easy on him, especially after that last lesson. Vexen had given him all the hardest questions to write up on the board, carefully scrutinizing the work, and picking out every tiny mistake he could find just to further degrade the boy.

And when he got into his history class, he put his extra books under his desk, and laid his face down on top of it. He faintly heard all of the buzz after the bell rang and the door was closed.

He looked up, eyes locked with green for the second time that day.


	3. Chapter 3

Warnings: Yaoi, Drug/ parental abuse, later rape, mild language

* * *

"Good afternoon, class. My name is Mr. Saner, and I will be replacing Ms. Lockheart because apparently she's knocked up and went into labor five hours ago." Axel had a huge grin on his face, looking once around the room and then his eyes found Roxas' again.

Some of the class chuckled at this remark. Axel turned his attention back to the other students.

"You guys can all call me Axel, don't mind saying my first name. I'm not one of those teachers who's a hard ass." He turned towards his desk and shifted his body to lean on it comfortably, rolling up the sleeves to his black button-up. He pulled a folder of papers off his desk and took out an attendance list. "Okay so let's see here..."

As Axel called out the names of various people on the paper, Roxas stared out the window. The sun was gleaming brightly down on to the soccer field and the leaves were swaying back and forth softly. Roxas could only imagine the salty smell of the nearby ocean in the air, sending him into a vast sky of daydreams, but was immediately pulled back to reality by a buzzing in his pocket. Roxas pulled out his phone discreetly and opened the text from Riku.

_"lol had fun in the car earlier. I gotta stay after with Mr. Leonhart for being late so I can't come to your locker after school. love you3 lol btw where'd you learn to do that with your tongue? it felt great."_

Roxas looked blankly down at the text. _I've been dating Riku for Two years now...Why does it feel so much harder to say I love you back with each day that passes? I never thought the day would come where I'd begin losing interest in my relationship with him..._

As Roxas was about to text a reply, the phone was snatched out of his hands. He turned to the side to see Axel staring down at him with a smirk. Roxas squirmed slightly under the redhead's gaze.

"Roxas Anderson..." Axel stated loudly. "I don't mind the texting in class but when I have called your name five times for attendance and you don't answer, it becomes a problem."

Roxas looked at the teacher apologetically. "S-Sorry Mr. San-"

"The name's Axel." Axel cut off, showing his cocky grin.

"Sorry, Axel." Roxas tried to avoid his gaze, but the teacher wasn't letting him get off that easily. Axel lifted the phone up a bit so he could get ready to read the text message.

"Maybe I should just read it to the class." Roxas turned to the teacher, hoping he was joking. That smile said it all. He was being serious.

"Uh-h Axel, please don't read that text." Roxas started reaching his hand out to grab it and Axel took a step back from Roxas' desk.

"Why?" Axel chuckled. "You shouldn't have anything to hide." Axel looked down and began reading the text aloud. "Had fun in the ca-" Axel stopped himself from speaking to finish reading the text. Roxas just placed his arms on the desk and his head in his hands, embarrassed beyond belief. _I told him not to read it. Oh, but nooo. He just had to do it....Him and that stupid grin of his._

Axel finished the text and began to burst into laughter. Roxas picked his head up and looked at the older man. _He's laughing! I would have expected him to say that's inappropriate or go to the principal's office. No...He's laughing!_ Roxas could feel the blush creeping up his neck to his cheeks.

"Oh man..." Axel laughed, wiping tears from his eyes. "You know what? Seeing the blush on your face was priceless. I won't take away your phone. Normally, I would have, but you just really made my day with that, Roxas Anderson."

Roxas began to feel sick. He found the sudden urge to clear the classroom. "Can I go to the bathroom?"

Axel turned to him, putting the phone on Roxas' desk. "Sure you can, Blondie."

Roxas grabbed his phone, shoving it into one of his pockets before leaving the room. He let out an expletive as the door closed, looking back to see green eyes following him before turning back to the class. Axel was smiling a knowing smile making Roxas want to scream and pull out his hair. He had to get away from those eyes, that smile. He had to get away from Axel.

Roxas stormed away from the door, having quite a mental breakdown in his mind. He got to the bathroom, going into one of the stalls and slamming the door, turning the lock quickly. He forgot about the text.

Roxas closed his eyes, leaning against the stall wall and slamming a fist down in frustration. He heard footsteps on the tile of the room, turning quickly to look at the floor in front of the short stall door. The steps stopped short of his door, the owner of the shoes probably seeing his feet from underneath. Roxas took a steadying breath before turning the lock open and opening the door.

"Well, well, if it isn't the class faggot. Your boyfriend in that stall with you?" Cold blue eyes glinted as the blonde smirked and folded his arms.

"What do you want, Seifer?"

"What makes you think I would want anything from you?" Seifer scoffed, looking disgustedly at Roxas. "Besides," Seifer leaned in a little, voice dropping low, "I'm sure the only thing you would be good for is some head, right?" Roxas looked reproachfully at the boy, disbelief and disgust plain on his face.

"Just leave me alone." Roxas tried to get past the other, stopped by a hand gripping firmly on his arm, tugging him to look back into steely blue.

"Why?" Seifer gripped harder. "You don't want to cheat on your boyfriend?" With that, Seifer slammed a fist into Roxas' gut, the boy doubling over from the sudden loss of air. Seifer released his grip on the boy, letting him slump to the ground. "That's what I think of faggots like you." He gave Roxas a swift kick to the ribs before grabbing a handful of hair and forcing the blonde to look at him, Roxas' face twisting in pain, making Seifer's grin broader. He pulled a fist back before letting it crash with the flesh above Roxas' left eye. He let the newly injured blonde go, his steps tapping slightly as he left, stopping briefly at the door, hand on the frame as he cast his glance over his shoulder, "Later," Seifer chuckled before leaving Roxas alone, slumped in the doorway to a stall, panting slightly from the pain and still trying to recover from the first punch.

* * *

Roxas walked into the classroom, keeping his face down to avoid someone seeing the forming bruise, a fist tightly clenched over his stomach and his teeth gnashed together to keep from whimpering. Axel looked up from his spot on Roxas' empty desk top, smile dropping when he saw the boy. "Hey kiddo, You alright?"

"Fine." Roxas walked over to his desk as Axel hopped off. He gave Roxas a suspicious look, but didn't further question anything. Roxas sat at his desk, opening a note book and picking up his pen to start mindlessly doodling. Axel didn't miss a beat in his lesson, but still looked curiously at the blonde.

Roxas continued the entire lesson like that, just keeping his eyes on his notebook and drowning out the world. About ten minutes before the bell rang, Roxas decided to start writing on the desk, the page in his notebook thoroughly covered in blue swirls and scribbles.

_Life sucks._

* * *

The school week was over and the twin's party would be Saturday. Roxas mindlessly tapped his foot outside of the school. He decided to text Riku and tell him he'd wait for him to get out of detention by his car. Roxas noticed all the students on the soccer field, playing the game he loved so much. He stopped playing a while back to try and focus on getting his grades up. But now that the new season was starting, and he was excelling in almost every class, he could probably start it up again. He was so deep in thought that he didn't notice the arms that wrapped around him from behind until that person poked him in the side to get his attention. Roxas squealed as he turned around and noticed Riku grinning.

"You were completely out of it, Rox." Riku chuckled. "What's on your mind?"

Roxas looked up at Riku, staring into those deep, aqua eyes. "I was thinking of going out for the soccer team again." Roxas answered softly.

Riku pondered in thought. "Go for it. You're one of the best soccer players I know. You'll definitely make the team." Riku smiled reassuringly. He wrapped his arms around Roxas and pulled him in tightly, backing up to lean against the car. "So, what are our plans for the rest of the night?"

"My mom called as soon as I got out of school. She says she wants me home today. Apparently, my cousin's coming in from Hollow Bastion tomorrow. She wants me to help her get everything ready for him." Roxas said, pouting at the thought of having to waste a beautiful day.

"I'll come with you." Riku said sweetly. "That way, things will get done quicker, maybe afterwards we can go see a movie.

"Okay." Roxas smiled, kissing Riku quickly. How could he doubt this?

Riku reached into his pocket, pushing the button on his keys that unlocked the car and pulled open the door

* * *

"Hey, Riku. What are you doing here?" Elena asked when the two entered the kitchen, Roxas automatically going for the fridge, after all, he hadn't eaten all day.

"Well, Roxas told me that you guys were setting up for his cousin. I figured that I should help." Riku shrugged, throwing a very charming smile her way. She sighed, shaking her head and smiling in return, busying herself once more with the dishes in the sink.

Roxas shook his head as he closed the door to the fridge, his smile disappearing when his eyes met the purple blotch of skin on his mother's shoulder. "Hey ma, what happened to you?" she stopped scrubbing, a hand automatically covering part of the bruise.

"I... I just fell down the stairs earlier. You know how clumsy I can be." she laughed a little, almost pained. Roxas grimaced, knowing full well she didn't fall, but left it at that. The look on his mother's face said it all.

"Ok, then. You two can start with the spare room." She tried changing the subject. Roxas' look went from mild concern to mortification.

"Mom, that room has three years of storage in it! Not to mention the fact that no one ever goes in that room, and Sora will never see it!" Roxas tried to convince her the effort would be wasted. She fixed her son with a stern look stopping any further argument before it started. The two reluctantly turned and headed upstairs to the spare room.

An hour and a half had passed, both boys slightly out of breath, now lying next to each other on the messy bed in the spare room. "There are still....eight boxes..."Riku panted and Roxas groaned. "What the hell are in those things anyway?" Riku asked, putting his hands behind his head and turning to face Roxas.

"I don't know." Roxas whined, rolling on his side with his head now resting on the older boy's shoulder. Riku chuckled, placing a kiss on the boy's forehead

Roxas stared at the wall silently. It stayed that way for a while. It wasn't until Riku began to lean up that he snapped out of his daze.

"You okay, Rox?" Riku asked concerned.

Roxas looked up at him. "Yeah, I-I'm fine."

"Really now?" Riku laid back down, wrapping his arms around the boy. "I know you too well. 'I'm fine' isn't going to cut it this time. So what's up? Is it about your dad?"

Roxas let his mind wander. Riku knew everything about him. From the abusive father to all the nights spent coked out, the reasons for his grades dropping and him having to quit soccer. He knew how Roxas liked to draw during his spare time, and eat sea salt ice cream. He knew it all.

"Yeah..."

"You want to talk about it?'

Roxas hesitated for a moment. He looked at Riku and felt tears begin to well up in his eyes. Shaking his head, he pushed closer into the boy.

"Not yet..."

* * *

Author's Note: Okay guys so we really need you to review. Were unsure whether or not to discontinue writing so please, try to help us out here. Thanks for the reviews so far and we hope you liked this chapter.

Disclaimer: We do not own any of the characters in this story.

Summary: What happens when you mix together a drug addicted boyfriend, an abusive father, and a huge crush on your History teacher? You get a teenage boy named Roxas. Not only is Roxas' life difficult, but what is he going to do when his club jumper of a cousin enters the picture?


	4. Chapter 4

The sun was coming in through the windows leaving patterns in Roxas' hair, catching the gold in such a way the he looked angelic in the soft light. He groaned, rolling over trying to escape the light, but instead found himself on the shoulder of another.

"Riku?" Roxas breathed, Riku smiled and wrapped an arm around roxas, pulling him closer. Roxas nuzzled in close to him, a content smile on his lips. They stayed like that for a while, the room getting brighter as the time passed.

"Riku?"

"Hmm?"

"Where are my clothes?" Riku laughed at this, making Roxas punch him lightly. "C'mon, don't laugh."

"Well Roxie, they're on the floor where they belong. Especially after last night." Roxas looked at him confused, trying to concentrate on the events of the day before. He could remember the car, the weird guy that turned out to be his history teacher, and his mom's bruise. He also remembered talking to Riku and going to the movies with him, but after they got to the theatre, his memories were fuzzy at best.

"Riku, what happened last night?"

* * *

_"So you sure you don't want to talk about it?" Riku smiled, but still had a look of concern tainting his otherwise perfect features._

_"Yeah, I'm sure." Roxas sighed, turning to face the window, watching the blurs of color and light that whipped by. _

_Riku tapped the steering wheel, glancing over every few seconds before turning his attention back to his driving. "C'mon Rox..."_

_"I said I don't want to talk about it, ok?"_

_"Ok, fine." Riku grumbled a bit before turning off the highway and into the parking lot. He pulled into a spot, jaw clenched from the slight anger he felt toward the blonde. "Rox-"_

_"Riku, just drop it!" Roxas screamed, his hands tangling in his hair. "Jesus Chr-" Roxas' eyes shot open wide when lips forcefully met his. He was even more surprised when he was pinned to the seat, Riku's tongue passing his lips and forcefully into his mouth, Roxas' hips grinding into the other's when hands other than his own tangled into his hair._

_"Ri-?" Another forceful kiss and this time a wandering hand. Roxas gasped when that same hand found its way into his jeans and pushed the other off quickly. "Riku? What the fuck?!"_

_"You said to drop it, so I did." Riku said with a shrug before leaning across and placing a kiss on the blonde's neck._

_"Riku," the boy groaned, his breath hitching when he felt teeth gently teasing the skin under his ear. "I...I just have a lot on my mind," another groan and a playful shove, "and I don't think this is helping at all."_

_Riku sighed, leaning back to his side of the car. He thrummed his fingers on the steering wheel before reaching over into the glove compartment. He came out a second later with a small bag with a white powder. "This might help clear your mind." He pulled a CD from the back of the visor and proceeded to cut lines with a razor he kept tucked in his wallet. Roxas stared open mouthed at him, disbelief plain on his features. _

_"You're not serious, are you?" Riku glanced up at him before returning to his work, a small smile forming on his lips as he rolled up a dollar bill and leaned over the CD. He came back up after a moment, pinching the bridge of his nose before smiling at Roxas. _

_"C'mon, you know you want it." Riku smiled, his pupils now dilated, giving him a faraway look. Roxas knew what it was like to be there. Knew what it was like to forget. He knew that even with one line he could forget about his mother's bruises, the quiet pleads as his father beat him or his mother. He could forget that he was coming up on the two year anniversary of a routine relationship where even the sex felt scripted. He could forget about the upcoming arrival of his cousin. He might even be able to forget the cat green eyes that stared so deeply into his own only hours before. He knew what was possible and he wanted it._

_But then again...._

_"Ri-Riku... but what about the movie?" Riku handed over the rolled up bill and smiled._

_"Fuck the movie."_

_

* * *

_

_"Riku! Riku slow down!" Roxas giggled as the two of them ran across Riku's front lawn. His parents had been out late again tonight so there was nothing to worry about as they slammed open the door to his house and proceeded inside. Once the door was closed Riku had Roxas pinned to the hard smooth surface of it, their mouths joined with breathy moans and hands scrambling to get random articles of clothing out of the way. _

_"Upstairs." Riku breathed, tugging Roxas' lip between his teeth, his hands snaking under the waistline of his jeans. Roxas gasped, knees buckling under the influence of heightened senses. Every touch, whisper, breath: it all felt new to him again. Almost like two years ago, but this time he was light with excitement and not nervous for what comes next. More laughs as the two stumbled up the stairs, breathless with the effort of keeping their mouths joined and trying not to trip over pants that were slowly riding down lower. _

_A few more stumbles and some loud laughs and Riku was pushing Roxas down into his bed. He was smiling, pushing light kisses on Roxas' face and neck, his head dropping into the bend where neck met shoulder._

_"Love you, Rox." Roxas' smile fell at the words. Words he didn't know whether he believed anymore or not._

_"If you love me then fuck me." Riku didn't hesitate at that one, his smile only growing broader as he bit down into the tender flesh, gaining a moan from the blonde. His hands expertly found all the right spots on the way down Roxas' body, slipping under fabric and farther..._

* * *

"You mean you don't remember?" Riku rolled his eyes, deeply sighing. "You've gotta be fucking kidding me..." With this the older boy got up, ignoring the clothes littering his floor and heading straight for a tall dresser. After a few moments he was dressed enough, leaving Roxas to lie there in confusion while he found something to snack on.

"Fuck," Roxas groaned when he still couldn't think of it. He tried to roll over and get up like Riku, but searing pain shot through him, forcing him right back to the soft surface. "FUCK!" He knew what that meant.

"You ok Rox?" came a muffled call from downstairs. Roxas glared in the direction but didn't dare move. He stayed in this position for a while, catching little snippets of conversations in his thoughts and other fragments of memory from the night before. They had to have done something for it to end up like this. Any other day Roxas would have at least had pants on. And remembered everything from the night before.

"You hungry?" Riku was now standing over Roxas with a plate in his hand. Roxas opened his eyes and glowered up at him. He had his fist clenched into the sheets by now and still didn't want to move. "Guess not?"

"Yes, I'm fucking starving." Roxas said coldly. Riku sat next to him and continued to eat. Roxas tried again to sit, this time clenching his mouth shut, sucking air through his teeth as he brought himself to what could pass as a sitting position. Riku grimaced as Roxas moved, now feeling guilty.

"I'm so sorry, Roxas." He put his plate aside and ran his hands through the boy's hair. Roxas just glowered, his eyes shut against the tears that lie just beneath. "Rox… Roxy baby…. I didn't mean to hurt you." Riku bit his lip, his arms wrapping around the blonde and slowly lifting him into his lap. Roxas held his breath until his head was resting against Riku's shoulder, the rest of his body awkwardly splayed across the planes of tanned skin. Riku wrapped his arms around his lover, gently running some fingers through golden strands.

"I love you, Roxas. I'm so sorry." Now Roxas let the tears come out. Riku thought they were just from pain or maybe the overwhelming feeling of love, but Roxas was crying for something else. Roxas knew that he felt no love for the boy that held him. At least not the love he wished it was. He loved Riku as a friend, sure, but he needed something more. He needed more than Riku could give him. More than just a simple line of powder to give him the light feeling of love. More than just awesome sex and deep kisses.

But what did he need?

* * *

"_What the fuck Roxas?! You didn't come last night! You know…"_

Roxas held his cell away from his ear as the angry shouts of one of the twins came belting through the tiny speaker. Riku just chuckled, having already dealt with his slew of angry voicemails for the morning. Roxas deleted three messages filled with the same shouts before getting one that didn't make his ear bleed.

"_Rox? This is your mother. You know your cousin is supposed to show up today and you're supposed to be here." _

Elena's voice was much quieter, but way more of a threat to the half dressed blonde. It was now well after twelve and he was just getting out of bed. He still hurt like all hell, but he was more used to it now. The blowjob from Riku helped a bit, too.

"What's going on?" Riku smiled, leaning into Roxas and placing soft kisses on his neck.

"My cousin… I was supposed to be home when he got there, I think…" Roxas leaned his head over to the side allowing more room for Riku to kiss up his neck. He finished out the messages, Riku now leaving small marks on Roxas' neck, and shied away from the older teen. "I need to get dressed. And you know that I can't be covered in marks."

"But you're mine." Riku said laughing, picking up Roxas' pants for him. "Besides, it's not like anyone will care anyway." Riku slipped into shoes and grabbed his keys out of his pants from the night before. "Not with your cousin there and everything. C'mon, we need to get going."

* * *

Twenty minutes later and the two were pulling up to Roxas' house with a very high Riku and a very pissed Roxas. They walked into the quiet living room, voices coming from the kitchen and some thumping from upstairs. Roxas followed the voices from the kitchen, recognizing his father's deep timbre immediately.

"Roxas! Why are you here so late? What the fuck happened to your neck?" His father grabbed his chin and roughly jerked his head to the side. Riku was just stepping into the room and Elena's eyes went from Roxas' reddened neck to Riku, knowing what happened. "Who was it?" there was a grin beginning to show on Roxas' father's features. "Was she any good?" A husky laugh and Roxas' jaw was released. He shuddered after the touch was taken away; he could feel slight bruises forming where the hand lay just moments ago.

"Riku! I haven't seen you in a while. So tell me, was she a looker?" Riku gave an agitated sigh after seeing Roxas' mortified look and just nodded. Roxas' dad didn't know about them and never could. Luckily a beep sounded from somewhere on the man's belt. "Got a call…" he glanced at his phone before shaking his head. "I'll be back later, Elena." He gave her a rough kiss before making his way out.

After he left the tension dropped from the room and Roxas looked to his mother. "Mom…"

"Why don't you go and say hello to Sora? He might need help unpacking." She cut him off before he could say anything else, and with a confused look, he and Riku left the kitchen.

"Unpacking? I thought he was only staying for the week." Riku asked, just as confused as Roxas was. They made their way into the spare bedroom, muffled bassy techno coming from the other side. Roxas held his breath as he turned the door knob. He hadn't seen Sora in years and didn't know what to expect. What he found wasn't it either.

* * *

Author's note:_ Howdy guys! I feel like I never get to talk at you people! So, don't know if you know, or care, but I've had this one over here up my ass for like two weeks telling me to get my ass over her house and write this chapter. Hope you like it! :]_

Bitch.

_Reviews? Please?!_


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note: Hey everyone. Were sorry for the long wait for this chapter. We'd like to thank all of the readers who decided to stick around for this, and the people who recently favorited or put our story on alert. You guys gave us a little push to start writing again so we hope you enjoy chapter 5!

Disclaimer: We do not own any of the characters in this story.

* * *

_"So-wa! SO-WA! Watch out!" Roxas shouted after his little cousin who was running up to the swings. One second the bouncy brunette was laughing and the next he hit the ground with a thud. And like most other kids his age he was the king of delayed reactions. He was quiet, on his hands and knees until Roxas came stumbling up to him._

_"Owie! I hurted myself!" The tears started spilling out of his eyes and Roxas' eyes fell on Sora's bleeding knee. Before Roxas could even look for help, Sora's dad was there scooping him up in his arms and heading back to the parents. Roxas followed quietly, still a little squeemish at the sight of all the blood._

_"I'm gonna take him back to the house, Larx?" Sora's dad said to his wife when she saw his knee. "You know, just clean it up and put on a band aid or two. Maybe some ice. We'll be back though, won't we Sora?" She nodded, telling them to be careful. Roxas watched quietly as they crossed the street and went into Sora's house. _

_A few minutes had passed when his aunt pulled out a little orange bottle, the kind you get after going to the doctor with all that yucky white stuff in it, and watched her open the bottle and swallow down one of the pills. And in another five minutes or so, she was playing with the bottle again._

_"Aunt Larxie, are you sick?" Roxas asked after a few more moments of her playing with the bottle. "Mommy always gets bottles like that when she's sick..." Elena shot Larxene an angry look, one tinged in fear._

_"Yeah, Rox, I'm sick. Not real sick....but sick enough." she sighed and stood._

_"Larxene, you have to stop." Elena said quietly to her sister. "If you need help-"_

_"I don't need help," Larxene said through clenched teeth, accenting every word sharply. "Now, I think I'm going to go and check on my son. I'll be right back, kay, hun?" This time she smiled in Roxas' direction before turning to cross the street._

_"Mommy?" Roxas stopped playing with his toys and looked to his mother._

_"Yeah? What's up, Roxas?"_

_"Where's Daddy?" Elena's smile fell at the question, thinking of an answer for the young Roxas._

_"He's playing card games with his friends. He'll be back later."_

_"Cards like me and Sora play?"_

_"Not exactly. He plays games for grown-ups." Before Elena could finish her explanation, Larxene was running back across the street, shouting all sorts of words Roxas didn't know at the time. She was closely followed by Sora's angry dad. "What happened?" She got up just as Larxene reached them, tears rolling down her cheeks._

_"Elena! th-that...animal!" Roxas couldn't understand what was going on, but all he knew was that his uncle did something very bad and that Sora wasn't around._

_"Elena," His uncle calmly looked at the two women, his voice almost soothing. "Elena, how could you believe her? You saw how many of those things she's taken, she's out of her fucking mind. Besides, I would never do that. You know I wouldn't."_

_Roxas might not have known what was going on, but that was his last memory of his cousin._

* * *

"Roxas!" In a whirl of sound and color, Roxas was suddenly tackled almost to the ground by a familiar set of blue eyes and out of control brown hair. But that was all that was familiar.

"S-Sora?" Roxas gasped when the boy hit him, nearly sending him to the floor, that is, if it weren't for Riku. He looked down at the body that was squeezing all the air out of him. About the same height and very messy hair. But it was the nice messy that looked like it was on purpose. "Sora, you're crushing me."

"Oh! I'm sorry!" The brunette quickly let go and beamed at the blonde, blues meeting almost identical blues. "I'm just so excited. It's been so long." Roxas was almost amazed at what he saw. He hadn't seen his cousin in over ten years and he never thought ten years could change someone so much. Sora still had his amazing blue eyes, pale complexion, and broad smile, but now there was something different about it. Something almost desirable.

He also had the same small frame that Roxas had inherited from his mother; Sora, from Larxene. And on that small frame hung nice formfitting clothes: long-sleeved, plain black shirt with black shorts to match. He also had on a thin choker, a glow stick necklace, a few big plastic rings, one black sock, one white sock, and about a million of those jelly bracelets on his wrists.

"Wow, Rox. You sure have changed."

* * *

"Roxas, your cousin is weird." Riku whispered when the two finally left the room an hour and a half later. They helped Sora unpack in near silence as the teen happily chattered on about how much warmer it was here, or how weird it was to not smell pollution and death-yes, death- everywhere you went now that he was on the islands.

"I just want to know why it looks like he's moving in. I thought it was just a visit." Roxas led Riku to his room and collapsed on his bed. Riku shook his head at the boy, walking around to the closet and getting clean clothes for Roxas.

"Go shower, change, and then we'll go have lunch, ok?

Ten minutes later, Roxas re-entered the room, hair dripping and fresh clothes on. He was wearing a white button down and some dark blue jeans. He threw his wet towel and dirty clothes in the hamper and lied on the bed. Riku wrapped an arm around the boy, pulling him closer.

Riku hummed, inhaling the smell of Roxas as he placed light and gentle kisses on the boy's neck. Roxas sighed, leaning in to kiss Riku, his thoughts wandering to anything but. His thoughts went from Riku and the lack of feeling to Sora, and how his life was still a mystery, even to piercing green eyes.

He was pulled out of his reverie when he felt hands go under his shirt, not bothering with the buttons. "R-Riku" he gasped a little. "Riku don't. Everyone's home."

"So?" Riku pushed farther, making Roxas' breath hitch and his back arch into the touch. They were so caught up in the moment that neither heard the footsteps outside the door, or the quiet chatter on the phone. In fact, neither even seemed to care until the door was slammed open and a bouncing brunette was in the threshold, phone pressed to his ear and a hurt look on his face.

"Roxas?! Why didn't you tell me that Kairi was having a party for the whole weekend?" Sora pouted at the two before realization dawned on his features. "OH! What are you two up to?" he chuckled before turning back to the phone, asking the other end if they knew about what he was seeing, most likely Kairi. He turned to walk out of the room, calling a quick apology before laughing and running down the hall.

* * *

"You know we're going to get hell when we get there." Roxas was saying to Riku, looking himself over one last time in the mirror. "We did miss last night."

"So? Let them get mad. They'll forget all about it once Sora is there anyway. Is he even ready?" Rikuchecked his phone and sighed impatiently. He was visibly shaking, his words filled with an almost unnoticeable rush. Roxas knew what that meant, knew that if it weren't for the unpredictable cousin of his, Riku would be doing lines before they left. Probably on the way there too.

"Ooook!" Sora bounded through the door, all in black and glow sticks. He was quite a contrast to Riku and Roxas, both in blue jeans with some form of white tops. "Who's ready to go?" His broad smile almost broke when he actually looked at the pair in the room. "You guys look so gay. You even match." Sora turned and started down the stairs. Roxas tugged on his white hoodie a bit. "Coming?"

Riku glared in the direction of the door before grabbing his keys. "Let's just get this over with." Riku followed in the steps of the other and Roxas just looked into the mirror again. _This is gonna be a long night._

One last look around his room and Roxas was out and down the stairs and yelling to Elena that they were off. He closed the door behind him and looked at Riku's car, the others already inside and buckled. Sora was already bouncing to some imaginary music and Riku had his head on a fist as he leaned angrily on the door. Roxas sighed and got in.

Riku grumbled and put the car in gear and started towards the twins' house, ignoring everything else but the road. It was almost painfully obvious that he was looking for his next fix, but with Sora right there…

Sora on the other hand was staring in awe out at the houses and other buildings, amazement plain on his face from the colors of it all, at how you could almost see the heat of the island radiating off of everything. It was made obvious that this was what he was looking at because he was quietly describing it all to no one in particular while mindlessly rubbing the fabric covering the seat.

"Is there something wrong with him? Or is he always like that?" Riku whispered, leaning in to change the radio station as a cover.

"I don't know. I haven't seen him in over ten years." Roxas glanced at Sora in the side view mirror, Sora oblivious to the world inside the car for the time being. They were now driving away from the town and into the richer parts of the island. Roxas was drifting off when he felt hands on the back of his neck. Small hands.

"Sora! What the hell?" Roxas shivered at the light touch, and shot around. Sora had almost the exact same distant look in his eyes that Riku does every morning.

"Sorry, Roxy, but you just feel so good. Did I tell you that I loved you?" Sora breathed through the gap in the headrest.

"Sora? Are you…?" Roxas gaped. Riku glanced back and caught a glimpse of the boy's eyes.

"I think so." He grumbled the next few words so low not even Roxas could hear him.

"No! It's ok Roxy, I'm just rolling!" When Roxas just stared at him Sora blinked his smile fading. "It's nothing bad, like cocaine or heroin, I promise. Just some mollys."

"Mollys? What the fuck is a molly?" Roxas almost shouted now.

"It's ecstasy, Rox." Riku looked at Sora in disbelief. Roxas didn't know much about the drug world, his experiments only going as far as what Riku did.

"Yeah, they make everything feel so good." Sora gave another big smile before licking his lips and winking at the blonde. "You should try it sometime."

* * *

Sora stared up at the huge house in utter amazement. "There is no way that I get to party in _that_." He whispered before closing his eyes and breathing deep, the heavy bass of the music thumping deep within him, his whole body buzzing with the anticipation. "So are we going in or not?" He beamed as he turned to face his cousin. Roxas nodded and pulled Riku by the hand to follow. Sora just giggled before heading for the huge doors.

"So, your cousin is allowed to go in hopped up on E and I can't even do a few lines to get level?" Riku asked when Sora was safely in the house and out of hearing range.

"Riku-" but that was all Roxas got out before he was attacked by a squealing Kairi.

"I'm so happy you guys made it! I almost thought you were bailing on us like usual," the raven-haired girl laughed. Roxasgave her a smile with pearly white teeth gleaming.

"No, we just got caught up a bit with Sora and all." Roxas mindlessly scratched the back of his head. The mention of his cousin made Kairigo wide-eyed with a huge grin on her face.

"I just saw him! He's talking to Namine right now but- my god, Rox, what happened to him?" Kairi giggled. "He's still a ball of sunshine, but something has definitely changed since we last saw him. All that black he wears…I don't think it suits his character very well…"

"Ha…You'd be surprised Kai." Roxas looked down at his shoes.

"I don't know about you two, but I need a drink. Now. Are you guys coming in?" Riku glanced between the two. Roxas looked up from staring at the dirt speck on his sneaker and Kairi smiled.

"C'mon, Rox" Kairi grabbed Roxas' hand. "Let's go have some fun."

* * *

An hour after arriving at the party, Roxas was already on his third drink, and still saw no sign of his cousin. He decided now would be a good time to use the bathroom while it was hopefully still open. Roxas walked out of the kitchen and through the halls, pushing through gyrating bodies and ignorant jocks. He noticed that the bathroom closest to the kitchen was already in use. After successfully getting past two couples making out, he grabbed the railing of the stairs, hoisting himself up and going two steps at a time.

After reaching the top of the stairs, he walked down yet another hallway to reach his destination. The lights in the bathroom were on, but he couldn't hear any voices. He knocked on the door lightly, waiting for a response. When it didn't come, he just pushed open the door. When he opened it, Riku was leaning against the wall and Sora was bent over the counter, a white line prepared on the surface and Sora's face inches away from it. He looked up as the door was flung open and cracked a smile.

"Hey, Rox! Are you joining in?" Sora stared at Roxas' shocked composure. His smile only dampened a slight bit. "Is something wrong?"

Roxas looked between Sora, Riku, and the line on the counter. All he wanted to do was get past the night and forget everything going on in his life. He wouldn't have to worry about mom, dad, school, bullshit…

"Uhh…No, there's nothing wrong." Roxas let his eyes fall on Riku, the other boy obviously uncomfortable with the situation. He noticed Sora walking away from the counter towards him, wrapping arms around his waist and nuzzling his face into the side of Roxas' neck.

"Mmmm…that's cool. So are you gonna do any lines with us?" Roxas could feel Sora's hands on the small of his back, lightly tracing circles into his shirt. Roxas glanced at Riku one more time. The boy's hands weren't as shaky as before so he must have already taken some. It wouldn't matter if Roxas only had a bit. It'd help him relax a lot more, and it would release him of the restraints holding all his problems to his body. It's not like he's never gone home high before. He wouldn't have to worry too much about what his parents would think.

"Well, Rox? Are you doing lines with us?" Sora lifted his head from Roxas' neck so ocean blue eyes could meet identical blues. Roxas took one last second to think and then decided on his answer.

"Yes."

* * *


	6. Chapter 6

Warning: This is pretty damn graphic. Have fun reading this. Disturbing sexual scene.

Disclaimer: Dont own anything from disney or square enix.

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Sora was dancing to a completely different beat, his eyes seeing what no one else did. Riku had found refuge on a couch, some poor girl drawn in by his ethereal beauty to supply him with never ending drink. Roxas had wandered to some deep corner of the house where the music was barely audible even to his heightened senses. He really didn't know why he was so against this particular drug, it did clear the mind and made everything brighter and more defined. He stumbled into a room full of textures, not much light and found residence there. It was quiet, but not in the usual suffocating way. This was much more serene.

Roxas sat, legs crossed, as he looked across the room and through the window to the stars. Stars which seemed to be so still, so small, but he knew that they moved so fast, faster than his heartbeat, and were much larger than anything he'd ever seen. He felt comfortable here, even with the door jamb stabbing into his shoulder blade, much like the times he had been thrown and pushed into very similar furnishings. His hands shook, much like they did in those times, but for a much different, much better reason. This was a racing heart and shaking hands that he could control.

"This isn't so horrible," he spoke quietly to the room, eyes closing and head resting against the wall. He took a deep breath, ready to take in the silence when his statement was answered.

"What's not so horrible, homo?" Roxas' eyes flew open and his back went ramrod straight at the cool voice, his gaze going wild looking for the owner to it.

"S-Seifer? What do you want?"Roxas' voice trembled and chills ran over his skin as he realized no one was around. No one would hear anything Seifer would do. This wasn't something Roxas could control, this was what he had always tried to avoid.

"What makes you think I would want anything from you, you little fag-bag?" Seifer had crossed his arms and was pacing slowly around the room, pausing at table tops and the bookshelf on the one wall to take in the contents of the room. Roxas' heart beat faster with each painfully slow step.

"Why are you here?" Roxas leaned his weight against the door frame as he slowly stood, eyes never leaving Seifer for a second.

"No reason, I just saw you walking away all by yourself and I thought to myself, why is the little queer boy going off on his own away from the party?" He stopped and pulled a book off of the shelf, mindlessly thumbing through its pages. His coolness was making Roxas more nervous and he could feel a scream building in the back of his throat, one he knew no one would hear. "But then I thought, well, maybe he just really wants his ass beat by a real man. Not his girly boyfriend for a change." He put the book down and looked to Roxas for the first time since entering the room, his face so cold it looked to be made of stone. "Would you like that, Roxas?" He started taking a few slow, predatory steps in Roxas' direction as he started to try and melt into the wall and slide away, his breathing faster and sweat starting to dampen his shirt.

Roxas had to make an escape and get closer to the noise pumping on the other side of the house, which now felt like acres away. And Seifer still kept his eyes on Roxas'.

"Do you want to know what a real man feels like?" Seifer breathed, the words almost dripping with venom, a hand reaching out and catching Roxas' shirt before he could get any farther away. Now Roxas was trapped and he could feel the breath trickle down his throat, hot and thick with liquor while Roxas turned his head and whimpered. In his current state of mind, Roxas couldn't think of what to do, he could feel his skin crawling and his heart beating so fast he was sure it would explode. His head was spinning so fast and his vision was blurring enough to make him feel sick. And just when he felt like he was going vomit he felt teeth bite into the flesh of his neck, his back slamming the two inches to the wall and a body press against him, suffocating him.

"S-Seifer, stop… Please." Tears started to form, pooling in the corners of his eyes as Seifer's teeth dug deeper.

"You couldn't make me stop even if you tried." Came the whisper close to Roxas' ear before he was thrown to the floor, Seifer straddling his waist before a fist connected with his jaw, then his eye, Roxas' arms pinned by Seifer's knees rendering him helpless. Seifer laughed at Roxas' pathetic cries before standing up. "I bet you've wanted this for a long time, Roxas." Seifer said slowly, drawing out the words while undoing his belt and pants and exposing himself. Roxas looked in horror through his good eye as he realized what was going to happen. He tried to scramble up to his elbows and away from him. Seifer chuckled and slammed his foot down on the sobbing blonde's chest. "You're not going anywhere. You're going to stay right there and take it like the queer you are."

Seifer knelt over Roxas and forced his pants off, Roxas still trying to get away, trying to cover himself, crying fully now. Seifer just shook his head and ripped them down to his ankles, using the cloth to better control him. He brought his hands up his legs and onto his thighs before forcing his legs open. Roxas was still trying to squirm out of Seifer's grip or close his legs against the assault, the whole time begging Seifer to stop, tears rolling in fat rows down his red and swelling cheeks. Seifer watched as Roxas squirmed and whimpered his struggles fruitless. "I'm told this hurts less when you don't fight, but you should already know that," he said before slamming into Roxas dry. He made a face as Roxas screamed, an almost half smile. "You know, this isn't so bad." He smiled broadly before pulling out almost all the way and slamming into Roxas again, this one a little bit easier then the first, but just as painful for Roxas. Seifer laughed, a full laughter like he was watching some cheesy comedy that just got to the punch line as again and again he slammed and thrust and push into Roxas with more force each time. He could feel Roxas tearing and watched as the blood began to slap between the two of them, Roxas screaming in place of moans, his head rolling back and forth against the hardwood floor. Seifer held both his wrists keeping him from even grabbing at anything as he kept smashing into Roxas.

Eventually Seifer paused, looking down at Roxas. "I'm tired of watching your fucking face, crying all over the place." Seifer grabbed the back of his hair and pulling him up before wrenching his shoulders around, turning Roxas' whole body around, never pulling out of him. Seifer smashed his face to the floor, leaning over his blood soaked back. "You fucking disgust me, bleeding all over." He thrust into the boy again, this time his screams muffled into the floor. "I bet you even disgust your boyfriend."

Roxas was dizzy, his thoughts swimming in a panic and he knew there was no way he'd ever get out of this. And how much longer could it take? He was starting to get lightheaded and his body felt like ice, probably from the blood loss. He could feel his teeth grind into his lips every time Seifer thrust into him, his face pressed harder into the floor. Seifer had his hands both forced behind his back, contorting his body painfully and ensuring Roxas wouldn't be fighting back. Seifer smirked down at the blood colored flesh of Roxas' back and mid scream he twisted his free hand into Roxas' damp hair, pulling the crying boy up and whispering in his ear, "You like that, don't you?" Roxas shuttered and gasped in pain with the next thrust. "Well I don't," and with that Seifer thrusted harder and harder and harder, Roxas choking on his cried, tasting the salinity of his tears. After a few of these especially rough pounds, Roxas found himself with the familiar feel of saliva pooling in his mouth before vomiting all over the floor. "I told you that you were fucking disgusting." Seifer spat before forcing Roxas' face down in the mess the just made.

Roxas' nose burned, his lungs ached and his throat was raw from screaming. He knew at this rate he would pass out, unless Seifer's release came soon, or if he came to his senses and stopped. A few more agonizing minutes later and Roxas was done fighting back. He just sobbed quietly, gasping with every push, every time his face now slid easily across slick floor, his knees not finding hold from being wet with blood. He could hear Seifer start to pant, his body tensing with the upcoming finish. Roxas would've smiled if he could, but the closer Seifer got, the worse it was. He could feel the swell when the thrusts became more erratic, his breathing a little more labored. He had stopped muttering the horrible things that just broke Roxas further and was gripping into the flesh of Roxas' wrists and into his hip. Roxas let out a slight cry through grit teeth when it happened, he could feel the hot liquid pour into him, felt it ooze out of him when Seifer pulled out, even more of it mixing with the almost dried blood on his back. He could almost see the delicate pink of it.

"We should do that again sometime," Seifer smiled, a glazed look in his eyes as he absently took off his blood soaked shirt and use it to clean himself, walking out of the room to find the nearest bathroom. Roxas lay still, feeling the hot sticky liquid trickle down his legs and join the blood which still flowed almost freely now. He was tired like he'd never been before, physically and emotionally, and he didn't even have the energy or will power to move himself from the puddle of blood, semen, and vomit. He knew it was drying in his hair and he was still trying to push it from his mouth. It was making him gag, which sent waves of pain all through his body. He wanted to cry out, but couldn't find the air to do it. He wanted someone to find him, but he also never wanted to be seen, especially in the pathetic heap he was in. He wondered what he must look like, like a broken toy thrown to the trash.

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"Hey Riku!" Sora giggled, falling into the silver haired boy's lap, throwing his arms around his neck and nuzzling his head onto his shoulder. "You feel so strong!" he cooed, his pupils like new moons in a sea of cerulean. "Where's Rox…as?" he looked around, slightly confused. "I wanted to dance with him and I thought he'd be with you." He looked back at the room, his face easily slipping into confusion. Just as quickly as his concern showed it vanished, "Riku, I love this song! Come dance with me!"

"No."

"Pleeease?"

"Hell no." Riku sighed and shoved Sora off his lap. "Go dance with someone else. Or go find Roxas and dance with him."

"But, but I want to dance with you!" Sora pouted in a childish way, his eyes tilting up to Riku from his new seat on the floor. The party behind him was still a huge mass of gyrating bodies, the music pounding rhythmically in everyone's ears and down to their feet. Sora held his look before telling Riku he was a meanie and getting to his feet to join the others. Riku raised a hand to his brow, deeply sipping his vodka concoction. It was true, ever since the three of them did the lines in the bathroom, Roxas had been missing. Riku almost wanted to worry, but he knew the way Roxas was, he was probably sitting in a room far enough from the music just to get away. It wasn't like Roxas was the type to cheat or leave without saying anything, so Riku knew there really was nothing to worry about. He drank deeply and watched Sora twist and move through the throng of people, the alcohol heavy on almost everyone's breath and the air was sticky with heat and sweat. This wasn't really Roxas' thing, so he could understand the need to get away. He let his head fall into his hand, his eyes slowly close as he breathed in the thick air. He felt the weight next, not too heavy next to him and he groaned, thinking his worshipper was back.

"Hey Riku," it was Namine, her voice barely audible over the pounding bass.

"Oh, Namine. I thought you were someone else." Riku smiled at the girl. "What's up?"

"I was wondering," She played absently with the hem of her dress, "have you seen Roxas anywhere? Cause I asked Kairi and she hasn't seen him since he got here."

"Nah, he probably found somewhere quiet to sit."

"Oh, well alright." She still looked concerned and got up. "I think I'm going to find him. I'll tell you when I do, ok?" she tilted her head with a slight smile. Riku nodded and watched he weave through the crowd with a grace he didn't think possible.

Namine had already searched most of the first floor, so decided to try upstairs. It was quieter up there after all. Maybe Riku was right and he was just looking for somewhere quiet to sit and escape. The air was much cooler and the music softly faded the farther into the house she went. She checked every room that hadn't been locked for the party, but with no luck. Roxas was nowhere to be found by any of the bedrooms. She started making her way toward he father's library when such a pungent odor assaulted her senses. Next she heard the sniffling. Someone was upstairs, definitely crying. She walked very quietly, almost tiptoeing to the open door, pushing it open a little farther. The sight made her wretch, the slight buzz of liquor in her limbs making her feel almost week from the sight. She'd found Roxas, or what was left of him at least.

He was curled on his side, tears just streaming down his face. He had a dry crust on his face and in his hair and one of his eyes was almost completely swollen shut. His bottom lip had split, and the bruise that extended from the cut onto his jaw was purple. She could see the blood dried all over him and the floor, everything seemed to be covered in the browning flakes. It also looked like someone had gotten sick all over the floor and on Roxas. He was trembling slightly and he didn't even look at her when she walked in.

"R-Roxas, are you…are you alright?" She saw his ripped shirt by the door, his pants were still around his ankles, covered in blood and semen, one of his shoes were missing. He managed a dry laugh before his body was seized in a fit of coughing. His voice came out shaky and rough when he stopped, barely whispering the word no. "I should go get help." She started to nervously back to the door. "M-maybe Riku-"

Roxas cried out when he tried to move toward her, the tears coming in a fresh wave as the pain coursed through him, making him flinch. "Please, not Riku… Namine… no one… please…" he gasped between sobs.

"Roxas, what happened to you?" she whispered.

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Author's Note: Sorry you guys had to wait so long. Hope it was worth it :( R&R?


	7. Chapter 7

Roxas sighed. He was in the dark in his bedroom. Nearly a month had passed since the incident at the twin's party. Sora had become well-adjusted to his new home across the hall, but Roxas couldn't feel more lost. His life was going out of control. He could still feel the faint pain in his abdomen from what happened that night. Namine had been right about one thing at least: Roxas should've sought medical attention. But how could he? He couldn't fathom letting complete strangers cast downward glances full of pity and disgust upon his bruised and broken body. And to top it off, they would make him press charges and eventually his parents and the whole world would look at him with the same sympathetic stares. He couldn't live like that so he dealt with the pain and lived through it.

It's not like there was something he could do about it now.

Roxas talked Namine into letting him stay hidden in her home for the rest of the weekend and had her tell Riku that he was feeling extra hung over. He told her that Riku would understand but never mentioned that earlier that night the trio had sullied her pristine restroom with the delicate white powder. She was good to him in those most painful days and he felt guilty for keeping it a secret, but he couldn't bear to see her reaction to the news. Kairi was the partier, Namine was the nurturer.

He convinced his mother to let him stay home from school for the first three days and this really piqued Riku's interest. Roxas rarely ever had an absence so he knew something serious must've happened. Riku called him everyday during lunch hour and Roxas told his lover that he just thought he had come down with something. "Must be the flu," Riku answered quietly, finding it hard to believe him. "I can come visit you after school-" but Roxas would cut him off every time and tell his boyfriend that he needed to go to soccer practice. He told him one truth at least, that he could barely muster up the strength to get out of his bed. He assured Riku that he couldn't come near him because it would destroy the blonde if Riku had gotten sick too. Sick at the sight of his soiled, broken lover.

The second day he heard his door slam open and he threw the blankets over his face, his cheek still very bruised. He listened breathlessly as the footsteps drew nearer and stopped close to the bed. He felt it dip with weight and sighed when he heard Sora's obscene music from the headphones he always had wrapped around his neck. "What do you want?" But there was no reply, only the same footsteps retreating from his room and the sound of the door clicking into place. He removed the covers and saw all of his text books and notebooks piled neatly on the bed next to him with a stack of loose leaf paper on top. Sora brought him his missed assignments. The top sheet had a very familiar handwriting on it and Roxas held it in a shaky hand. It was a note from Riku and Roxas could easily tell that he still didn't buy the flu excuse but would let him take his time coming back to school and to him. This happened from time to time, like the last time Roxas told Riku that he didn't like the drugs. Riku got angry and shouted and slammed a locker and Roxas just left. It took him a whole week to forgive Riku for exploding on him like that when he was just showing concern for the older teen, but Riku gave the blonde his space and waited for his lover to find his way back into his open arms.

When Roxas did return to school, his bruise was still obvious even though he spent an hour in the mirror trying to cover it up with some of Elena's make up. He got it to look far less extreme than it was, but still couldn't effectively hide it so he donned one of Riku's sweatshirts that he had kept in his room. It was baggy on him and hung low and the hood actually hid most of his face from view. It was that moment that Roxas felt blessed for being short; this meant less people would be able to see his face well. He was relieved that the pain had become much more bearable in the four miserable days and he could almost walk without limping too noticeably.

Riku noticed. And Roxas watched as his boyfriends face dropped, the laughter melting from his voice when he caught the sight of him walking up to him his first morning back. Namine had a look of genuine surprise and slight mortification, and Kairi and Sora seemed not to notice.

"Hey." Roxas breathed. He had his mother drive him to school to avoid the long walk but the heavy backpack didn't help his limp. Riku looked him up and down and reached a hand up to his face, pushing the hood back off his face. Namine gasped and Kairi and Sora fell silent.

"Roxas... What the fuck?" Riku asked coldly, his eyes were ablaze with a flurry of emotion, mostly anger. "Is this what you were trying to hide from me?" He barely breathed the words and Roxas grimaced. "Who did this? I'll kill him."

That's when the lie first formed in Roxas' mind. "Riku, I... It happened at the party. I was... Someone jumped me. I don't remember who it was though." Roxas shared a glance with Namine who grimaced knowing he wanted her to go along with it. She knew everything, she knew exactly what happened and exactly who did it.

"I swear I'll find him, Rox. I'll-"

"Don't. What's done is done. There's nothing you can do to fix it." Roxas held his gaze to Riku's and his tone left no room for argument. "Except maybe carry my bag for me." Roxas smiled when the teal eyes softened and a small smile played across his lips. He handed the heavy bag to Riku and thanked him and Riku leaned down and kissed Roxas gently on the jaw and the blonde froze. At that exact moment Seifer had locked eyes with the blonde from down the hall and smirked at him, holding one finger up to his lips in a 'shh' pose. Riku looked puzzled at Roxas for a moment before placing a hand over his own mouth.

"Sorry, Rox, I already forgot about your injury." Roxas relaxed and held a hand to his bruised cheek and shook his head dismissing Riku. The days continued in a similar fashion. Riku would carry his books for him whenever possible and would try and keep some form of contact between the two. This kept Roxas on edge; he was still uncomfortable being touched by anyone. He felt guilt every time Riku leaned in to kiss him because he would just shake him off. He never hung out with him after school and never offered to stay late to watch his practices or games anymore. Riku figured it was just because he was still recovering from getting beaten up, but Roxas couldn't stand the thought of Riku kissing him and tasting him. Roxas would never be clean of Seifer ever again, and he couldn't stand it.

He felt haunted everywhere he went. Even his home no longer felt safe and he always found himself locking his bedroom and bathroom door behind him. He rushed through meals and no one seemed to notice. His mother only thought that he was uncomfortable with Sora being around, but Sora kept as much to himself as Roxas did. He felt like he needed to keep one eye open as he slept and would sit low in his desk to avoid standing out too much. He flinched anytime he saw blonde hair or heard footsteps behind him. His whole confidence had seemed to crumble and he could barely look at himself in the mirror anymore. When he did he hated what he saw.

He watched as the marks on his face slowly faded, Sora kept referring to them as "trophies" whenever they were the topic of conversation. Only Namine knew of the foot shaped bruise across his chest which took the longest to disappear. He checked it every day after his shower and grimaced as he watched it go from a deep purple to a nasty green and light yellow. Now, a month later, there were no physical signs of the incident, no more "trophies" to see.

Roxas looked to his door, the sound of footsteps coming from the other side. He could recognize them as Sora's and waited to hear his cousin's door open and close from across the hall. It never came though and instead the brunette opened Roxas' door and walked in.

"Roxas, I'm dying." Sora sat at the edge of Roxas' bed, staring off into nothingness. "This place is so dead."

"What are you talking about, Sora?" The boy fell back onto Roxas' bed, arms out next to the brooding blonde. He huffed slightly and looked to Roxas, his eyes narrowed.

"Aren't you bored?" Sora seemed on edge, much like Riku could at times. He also seemed a lot more alert and aware than usual. "There's nothing to do here. Back in Hollow Bastion there was always something to do." He pulled a cell phone from his pocket and checked the screen. He laughed lightly and texted something quickly before rolling over and looking at Roxas, an eerie excitement obvious in the deep blues. "Let's do something." Sora smirked and moved to straddle Roxas' hips. Roxas gasped and froze, fear rushing through him in an instant.

"Come out with me. It'll be fun." Sora whispered, his head nodding towards Roxas' window.

"S-Sora, I-I-"

"C'mon, you've been so down in the dumps, let's go have fun for once," Sora almost whined and grabbed Roxas' face. "It'll be our little secret." Roxas thought about this for a moment and move Sora's hands from his face.

"Where would we go?"

"I know a place, but you can't go dressed like that." Sora gestured towards Roxas' baggy black t-shirt and white sweats. He got up and walked over to Roxas' closet and looked inside. After a minute he clicked his tongue and shook his head. He moved on to his dresser and sighed at its contents. "Roxas your clothes are so gay, no offense." He picked up a light blue shirt and checked the tag, then a pair of jeans. "But you can wear some of my clothes; they should fit you just fine. Gimme a sec." Sora left the room only to return with a small pile of clothing. Roxas stared as Sora laid out skinny black jeans and a fishnet shirt.

"I'm not wearing that." Sora pouted as Roxas stared in disbelief at the garment.

"Fine, pick your own clothes, but don't blame me if you're stared at all night. And not in a good way." Sora winked and picked up his clothes. "Anyway, be ready in ten minutes," and with that he left the room. Roxas groaned wondering what he was getting himself into. He went to his closet and pulled out his favorite jacket and regular pants. A few simple accessories later and Roxas had on his favorite outfit. He had on his jacket with the checker pattern across the chest and over the shoulders, under this was another zip up that he wore closed. He had on pants that started out black but had a cream color sewn on at the thighs. He had on a thick bracelet and a few solid black and white rings to keep up the checkered theme. When Sora entered his room he hummed in mild approval.

"Not exactly what I was thinking, but I suppose that will work." He walked over to the blonde and tousled his hair a bit before he smiled. "I want you to look your best since you're meeting an old friend of mine." He bit his lip and Roxas went to ask who but Sora stepped back and turned to the window. Roxas looked confused for a moment when his cousin sat on the sill and swung his legs out the window. "See you in a sec." And just like that Sora pushed off the sill and out into the night.

Roxas rushed to the window and looked out into his front yard. He cursed under his breath and saw Sora brushing off his pants. "It's not that hard, I've jumped from higher before." Sora whispered loudly and gestured for Roxas to follow. Roxas shook his head and stared incredulously at his cousin. Sora gestured for him to follow and Roxas saw a set of headlight flash twice down the street. He groaned and checked the distance again before sitting on the sill, taking a deep breath and pushing off.

He landed awkwardly but didn't fall like Sora had. He stood amazed that he had actually snuck out the window of his room. Sora grabbed his wrist and rushed him to the edge of the yard and down the street. Sora hurried to the silver Lexus parked a good way away from the house and opened the back door and got inside, dragging Roxas in after him and reaching across the blonde to shut the door.

"This your cousin?" A husky voice came from the front seat as the car pulled off down the street. Roxas gaped at the man; he had pink hair and a beautifully cold face.

"Yupp, this is Roxas. What do you have for me? I've been out for a week." Sora said quickly, leaning into the back of the driver's seat and peering around the head rest.

"How are you out already? I sent you off with more than plenty. I got the usual shit, but I'm guessing you'll be wanting these." He held up a sandwich bag of small white pills. "I got some nice kush too if you're interested."

"How much?" Sora asked, taking two of the pills out of the bag and popping them in his mouth.

"The usual." The pink haired man purred and sent a wink towards Roxas in the rearview mirror. Roxas couldn't help but wonder what that meant. Sora leaned forward and whispered something in the man's ear and giggled. The man turned to look toward the blonde and said something back to Sora.

"Oh, Roxas, this is my very, very good friend Marluxia. I forgot to mention that." Sora sat back in the seat and sighed contently. "Did you want anything? He carries a lot of shit with him, maybe some blow for you?" Roxas shook his head, a scowl on his face.

"I hate that shit." Sora looked confused for a second before nodding slowly.

"Sorry, I just assumed that you were into it since we did it together that one night with Riku," Sora tapped a finger on his chin in thought for a moment. "Well I think you should at least get a little something, you've been so uptight lately. You know what, I'll take that kush you offered before." Marluxia tossed another bag over his shoulder and Sora caught it effortlessly. This one was a gallon sized Ziploc bag with a few smaller bags inside along with a few boxes and a squat metal cylinder. Sora shoved a hand into the bag and pulled out another sandwich bag with weed inside and held it to his nose, breathing in deeply before smiling and offering it to Roxas, who crinkled his nose in response. He could smell the buds the moment they were removed from the larger bag. "You'll like this, I promise." Sora went to work and Roxas watched for a moment before turning to the window. He wondered where they were going, they were on the interstate and he hadn't caught sight of a sign yet.

"I have other shit if pot's not your preference." Marluxia had a sly grin on his face. "First sale is free." Roxas looked at him blankly before shaking his head.

"I wouldn't even know what to get honestly. I've never been big on drugs. Just occasionally." He shrugged and looked back to Sora who was putting his finishing touches on the tightly rolled joint in his fingers. He put it between his lips and lit it, inhaling deeply and quickly passing it to Roxas. When Roxas didn't take it right away Sora waved it to him, and he obliged. He held it between his fore fingers and thumb and looked it over hearing Sora exhale slowly.

"Hurry up, before it goes out and tastes all icky." He brought the stick up to his lips and inhaled like Sora moments ago only to cough and sputter from the harsh sting of the smoke in his lungs.

"I get it, he's a virgin," Marluxia chuckled and reached over his shoulder for the joint, taking a hit and quickly passing it back to Sora.

"I guess he is. It's ok Rox, you'll get used to it." Sora took another hit and passed the joint back to Roxas. He hesitated before taking a much smaller drag this time and realized that it was, in fact, easier this time around. He passed it to Marluxia, whose hand lingered a little too long for Roxas. He caught his eyes in the rearview again and saw the glint in them. He quickly looked out the window to avoid his gaze; it was unsettling how quickly he felt uncomfortable with the attention. He stared out at the passing mile markers, accepting the joint when it came his way again, this time considerably shorter than the first time he had it in his hands. "You have to hold it differently now that it's almost done," Sora had leaned against him and helped Roxas move his hands to better hold the thing. Roxas almost giggled at how sluggish and heavy his limbs were beginning to feel. He breathed in more of the earthy smoke and held it in, looking out the window before exhaling very slowly and coughing a little. Sora leaned over the center console of the car and came back with a bottle of water which he offered to Roxas who took it gratefully. The coolness of the water was exactly what his parched throat needed and after taking a swig he passed it back to Sora.

"Where are we going?" It had felt like they were in the car for hours. Time was beginning to slow down significantly and the inside of the car began to wobble in Roxas' vision.

"Green Requiem." Roxas looked confused and Sora smiled. "My favorite bar, you'll see."

After another twenty minutes Marluxia was taking the exit for Hollow Bastion and Roxas peered out the window in wonder. He wasn't sure if the city was actually this amazing or if his high made it seem that way, but he didn't care. He could understand what Sora meant when he said he had felt dead before; this city was bustling with life. There were blazing lights and so many cars and people- none of whom seemed concerned with the time. Roxas peered over the front seat to check the time. It was nearly twelve thirty.

"Sora," Roxas leaned over to his cousin and whispered after a moment, "If we're going to a bar, how are we getting in? Neither of us are legal yet." Sora laughed dismissively and reached into his pocket and pulled out a small black wallet from which he produced his license. It read that he was twenty four and Roxas gaped at him. "You have a fake ID? Where'd you get this?"

"I know people. You need one of those to get anywhere in the city." Sora tucked the license back into his wallet, pocketing it once more. "I should probably get it redone soon; my expiration date is coming up." He laughed softly at the thought and looked to Roxas who still wore a face full of surprise. "But no worries, we won't need IDs where we're going."

Sora was right. The trio walked up to what seemed like the back door to a warehouse. A large man stood outside and gave a nod to Marluxia and let them inside without a word. Roxas felt a shiver travel up his spine when the bouncer looked him over, nodded and licked his lips in approval. He brushed it off and walked into the warmth of the bar. He could hear music and chatter of the people inside. They walked past the coat check and into the main area. There was an area designated for dancing and mingling with small booths to lend some privacy along the walls. A long bar could be found on the far side wall and more tables to accommodate drinks, food and women's purses while they grinded mindlessly against near strangers.

Marluxia led the two teens over to a booth and sat, rather lounged on the plush leather of the bench. Sora looked around quickly before disappearing into the throng of bodies leaving Roxas to stand awkwardly in front of the pink haired man.

"Sit down, people are starting to stare at you." Roxas shifted and nervously looked at the space next to Marluxia. What had he gotten himself into? He knew what the stare the man was giving him meant because it was the same hungry way Riku looked at him after they had shed their clothes for the first time together. Roxas sat as close to the edge of the seat as possible and Marluxia leaned over to him and whispered in his ear "Better? You seem nervous." Roxas cringed inwardly at the hot breath on his neck and faked a smile.

"I guess I'm just coming off my high is all." To this Marluxia flagged down a busy waitress and ordered a few drinks. She looked skeptically at the blonde but nodded and left without a word. She brought back six shot glasses with a clear liquid in them and set them on the table. Marluxia tucked a fifty dollar bill into her apron and she smiled when he told her to keep them coming. He pushed two of the glasses in front of the blonde and smirked.

"Here, this will help you relax. My treat." Roxas looked warily at him and watched as he tipped his two shots back one right after the other and exhaled contently. Roxas slowly brought a glass up to his lips and swallowed hard trying to avoid the burn. He was proud of himself when he fought back the gagging sensation and put the glass back down. Sora reappeared and leaned over the table and grabbed the other two glasses and kissed Marluxia chastely shouting out a thank you before waltzing back into the crowd. Roxas saw him take the shots in much the same manner as Marluxia and he wondered how often Sora found himself in the situation before he moved into Roxas' house just a month before.

"So how do you know Sora?" Roxas found himself turning to Marluxia now curious about this situation. Marluxia smiled and nudged the forgotten shot closer to Roxas.

"First this, then your questions." Roxas hesitated. He hadn't drank since that night, and even then he was never one for hard liquor. But he bit back his hesitation and lifted the shot to his lips and emptied the glass. Sora obviously trusted this man, so why shouldn't he?

When he placed the glass back on the table with a resounding thud his head started to swim again. He fought a smile from tugging at his lips and turned his attention back to his new accomplice. Light blue eyes gazed into ocean blue and Marluxia smirked. "I supposed you could say we met through a friend a long time ago. I don't remember the specifics, but I can't get rid of him and he's always good for paying for what he buys." He looked over to the mass of people and could easily find the small brunette. "He's a pretty good fuck too."

Roxas' jaw dropped. Marluxia had seemed so dismissive about how he said this. Now those eyes turned to him again and he quickly looked away. 'Sora actually slept with this guy? I mean, he is a very good looking guy, but he seemed so much older than the two of them…' Roxas thought when their waitress brought over three more shots. Roxas took one quickly and emptied it trying to chase away his thoughts.

"So," Roxas shivered when he felt Marluxia's breath against his neck. The older man had inched closer to Roxas and was leaning into him, a hand resting on the blonde's knee, "Are you anything like Sora?" Roxas flinched when he felt teeth catch his ear for a moment.

"I-I don't-"

"Marluxia! Dance with me!" Sora giggled coming up to the table. He gave a small cheer when he saw the new shot waiting for him and took it greedily. Roxas had his eyes fixed on the wood surface of the table. He was suddenly very uncomfortable being here with this strange man and his cousin. Just what kind of life was his family keeping the brunette from? Either way it started to make sense. He felt the weight on the bench seat shift as Sora dragged his accomplice to the dance floor and a rather slow song started up. Some of the crowd seemed to dissipate from the floor, but others stayed and danced closer to their partners, moving in synch to the twisted sounding tune. Roxas didn't recognize the song, but the man's breathy voice that carried out over the tune sounded just a tad familiar. Roxas saw Sora circle the taller man before stopping at his chest and running his hands down the length of him, slowly dropping to the floor and making his way back up. He turned his back to Marluxia and swayed a bit, his small hands guiding much larger ones across his frame. Sora seemed different to Roxas, but he couldn't figure it out. His cousin was so at peace, even though it was obvious that his dance partner had ulterior motives now. It was almost as if Sora had planned it. Roxas looked away when their mouths met and their sway started looking more and more intimate.

The waitress brought by another round of shots and paused a moment looking hard at Roxas. He stared back and she opened her mouth to say something but quickly closed it and turned and walked off. Roxas smiled a little in confusion and he noticed the alcohol was starting to numb him.

"Rox, we'll be right back. Don't go anywhere." Sora crooned from behind him. Roxas turned to look at him as he downed his fourth shot. Marluxia murmured something in his ear and Sora laughed. "I am not getting too drunk. At least not too drunk for what I'm about to do to you." Sora winked before leading Marluxia away from the table and to a door somewhere in the back of the club. Roxas shuddered at the thought of what it was Sora actually was going to do and turned his attention to his new drink innocently waiting on the table before him.

* * *

Sora giggled as he opened the door to the men's room. It was empty and Sora headed straight for the last stall on the far wall of the small room. The music from the main room of the Green Requiem could still be heard, only slightly muffled by the door. Sora thanked the gods the first time he was lead into this room many years ago for that and to this day favored the stalls over the alley behind the bar where groups of people huddled around to smoke their cigarettes. Sora thought that sex in alleys was for people without shame or class, and Marluxia at least had class.

When the pair was in the stall, door latched, they instantly pushed into each other, their mouths colliding in a passionate battle of tongues. Sora whimpered when Marluxia pulled his lip between his teeth and reached for the elder's belt buckle. When he finally got it undone he opened his jeans and exposed Marluxia's erect member and smiled into the kiss as he wrapped his small hand around its girth. Sora pulled out of the kiss and bit his lip looking up to the pink haired man through thick lashes. Marluxia licked his lips and placed heavy hands on Sora's small shoulders and guided him to his knees. Sora pumped his hand a few times before slowly taking in all of the man with no trouble. Marluxia let his weight lean back on the stall door, his head rocking back with a groan from the warmth of the brunette's mouth and he sucked and bobbed with ease. Sora let out a few small moans when he felt fingers tug on the hair at the back of his neck.

Before long Sora was pulled back to his feet and unceremoniously turned and pushed into the wall opposite the one Marluxia was leaning on. Sora grinned and thrust his hips toward Marluxia, silently goading him to come ravish him. Sora needed this. He moaned when Marluxia closed his mouth on the bend in his neck where it met shoulder and bit down gently. His hands easily found the brunettes black jeans and pushed them down. Sora gasped when his face suddenly met the stall wall and realized Marluxia had turned him around. He drew in a breath anticipating what would come next.

Sora let out a pained yelp followed by a sharp intake of breath when Marluxia entered him. "Mmm, been a while, huh?" Marluxia groaned. "God you're so fucking tight." He pushed a little deeper and Sora whimpered.

"Marluxia, it hurts." A hand covered his mouth and Sora felt the man lean in closer.

"Not for too long. Besides, you owe me, remember?" Marluxia licked the shell of Sora's ear as he slowly pulled out and thrust back in. The brunette held back the tears knowing that he was right. It would only hurt for a little while longer, and then...

The brunette let out a gasp of pleasure when Marluxia finally hit the spot he was looking for. Sora groaned, begging for more and Marluxia obliged him. He thrust a little harder and faster each time and groaned as he watched Sora's body tense with each thrust. Sora was mewling and panting and grabbling at the stall and within a few short minutes he felt tingly and light. Marluxia moaned as Sora tensed and gasped as he came but he didn't slow his pace. Sora went limp and moaned loudly until he finally felt Marluxia tense, his thrusting becoming erratic before he finally thrust deep one last time. The brunette groaned when he felt his partner slip out and slumped onto the wall.

The two were silent as they cleaned themselves up and fixed their clothing. They left the stall without cleaning up the mess they left and went to the mirrors. Sora smirked when he saw the new mark on his neck and saw Marluxia's cocky grin reflected at him.

"I needed this."

"I know."

* * *

Roxas sat at the table a little more relaxed now. He couldn't understand the dynamic between his cousin and his drug dealer. Was this how Sora paid for his shit? Or was there actually something between them?

"Roxas?" Roxas froze again. That voice was too familiar. He turned and saw bright red and vibrant green.

There was a moment of silence and shock exchanged between the two. Roxas looked his teacher up and down before smiling. "Uh….Hi? What are you doing here?"

"I should ask you the same." Axel's eyes were angry but confused. "I work here. One of the waitresses told me she thought there were underage drinkers at this table. How'd you get in?" Roxas knew he was in trouble, but his body wouldn't react the right way. Instead he laughed.

"Hello Axel." Roxas hiccupped and looked to where this new voice came from. Sora was stumbling slightly with Marluxia in tow. He sat on the edge of the seat and inhaled sharply, grabbing two of the shots on the table. Sora winked before taking both shots and looking to Marluxia who stood in front of the red head smiling devilishly. "Haven't seen you in a while."

"What are you doing with these kids, Marluxia?" Axel spat. Roxas grew curious, Axel knew Marluxia too?

"Just having a night out with an old friend of mine and a new friend. I don't see children here, do you? That would prove problematic for you, wouldn't it?" Marluxia let out a low chuckle. Axel was visibly fuming. He shot a glare towards the two in their seats and leaned in close to Marluxia.

"I think you need to leave. Don't ever let me catch you here with them again." Axel said curtly before turning and walking off. Marluxia shook his head and chuckled at the retreating form.

"That's ok, Marly. This place is starting to be a drag anyway." Sora stood and wobbled a moment before righting himself. "C'mon Rox. Let's go!" Roxas looked into his cousin's blue eyes and shrugged. He stood and followed the others to the front. He caught the sight of red again and turned towards it. His eyes caught green and he just stared for a moment. There was so much emotion in those eyes. Roxas could see anger in them, along with... hurt? He wasn't quite sure what it was but he felt awful for ruining his sub's night. He gave a small wave and Axel shook his head before turning away from the blonde. Roxas frowned and turned to see Sora and Marluxia still making their way through the bodies to the exit. Roxas took a deep breath and headed to the bar.

"Axel!" He shouted and the red head snapped his head in his direction.

"I thought you were leaving Roxas." Roxas bit his lip and looked up into angry green eyes. It was only the bar between them now and Roxas still felt floaty and silly. He knew it was very dangerous that Axel saw him here though.

"Please," Roxas reached a hand out and grabbed onto Axel's hand that was clenched on the bar. "Please just... can this stay between us? Like a secret?" Roxas fought back a giggle. He thought it was a strange thing to say, but he knew it needed to be said.

"Roxas-"

"Please?" he pushed further.

"We'll talk about this after class on Monday. Just get out of here, go home, and get away from that man." Roxas look puzzled and Axel just shook his head. "I mean it, Roxas. Don't trust him." Axel took his hand out from under the blonde's and turned. "Go home." Roxas nodded still confused. What was that supposed to mean? Did Axel actually know this guy? He started for the exit again, his thoughts jumbled and fuzzy. His head was really spinning now and he felt uneasy on his feet. He stumbled and tripped over something and felt a strong grip on his arms. He looked to find Marluxia helping him to right himself and smiled. Marluxia couldn't be that bad.

"Careful. Watch your step now, don't want you getting hurt." Marluxia led Roxas to the door and all the way to his car without letting go of him. Roxas was very grateful for the help and thanked him. "No need to thank me." He felt dizzy when he sat in the car and held his head. "Maybe next time you shouldn't drink as much though." Roxas smiled and nodded.

"It's ok, Rox! I'll just have your drinks next time." Sora chuckled. He was looking at his bag of pills and hummed before reaching in and taking another one out.

"You should slow down Sora. No need to go through a whole stash in one night." Marluxia got into the driver's seat and pulled out of the parking spot. Sora pouted but put the pill back nodding. He instead pulled out the bag of weed and started rolling another joint.

Roxas stared out the window ignoring the light conversation in the car and the passing of the joint. His head was spinning and he couldn't think straight. He couldn't keep his mind from bright green eyes. He knew he was too drunk when he realized he wasn't nervous about getting into trouble or how he should probably listen to his teacher's warning about Marluxia. After all, a drug dealer that gets kids into bars probably isn't the most trustworthy person you could associate, but Roxas hadn't felt this alive since before that night at the party. Actually, Roxas hadn't felt this alive in over a year. He frowned when he thought about his obviously failing relationship with Riku. Would he even tell his boyfriend about tonight? Probably not…

"C'mon Rox, we need to be extra careful getting back in your house." Sora was nudging his shoulder and Roxas realized they were around the corner from his house. Marluxia smiled and tilted his head up toward the teens giving them a silent goodbye before speeding off down the street and into the night.

"Thanks for coming tonight. I really had fun." Sora smiled at his cousin as they walked toward their home. Roxas just nodded his head, not really answering the brunette. Sneaking into the house wasn't as hard as Roxas had originally thought. When they got to the front of the house none of the lights were on and Sora muttered a "thank god" for Roxas' family not having dogs. Roxas never noticed before now how easy it would be to actually sneak in and out of his house. It concerned him because he knew anyone could do it if he and his cousin could successfully get in and upstairs in the state they were in. The two stumbled a little on the stairs, but made it to their bedroom doors relatively quietly.

"Rox," Sora whispered before Roxas could open his bedroom door. "Tonight really meant a lot to me. I'm seriously glad you came."

"Sora, it's no big deal. Really-" Roxas was cut off by lips. His head swam and he stared shocked at his cousin who was currently pushing his tongue gingerly into Roxas' mouth. They separated before Roxas could think to react and Sora smiled.

"It really is a big deal to me." Sora's eyes locked with Roxas' for a moment before he turned and disappeared into his own room, leaving Roxas in the hallway more confused than he had been all night.


	8. Chapter 8

Roxas sat on his bed staring off into the darkness of his room. He was dizzy and drunk just moments ago, but now he sat, sober and confused.

Sora had just kissed him.

And not just a normal, non-romantic kiss, but a real passionate and desperate kiss. Roxas didn't know if he should be shocked, appalled, disgusted, or ashamed so he sat and just stared. So much had already happened tonight and he just couldn't wrap his head around it. He snuck out of his house to go to a bar with his cousin and a complete stranger, smoked pot for the first time, and got caught drinking by his substitute teacher. Forgetting about the talk they'd have on Monday he instead tried to make sense of the kiss he had just shared with his cousin.

Roxas felt nauseous, and not just from all the alcohol he drank. He couldn't understand why Sora would do that. They were related and you just don't do things like that with your relatives.

"Maybe," Roxas said to no one but himself, "He was just really, really drunk." People did strange things all the time when they were drunk, so maybe this was just another one of those situations. Besides, it's not like they were ever really close to begin with, so maybe Sora just wasn't thinking.

The next morning made Roxas relax considerably. Sora acted as if nothing had happened and the blonde was sure that Sora was just way too gone last night to remember anything. Roxas was actually a little fuzzy with the details himself.

"Riku's here!" Elena called up the stairs while Roxas finished brushing his teeth. He used to sleep in everyday until Riku would text him to wake up, but now Roxas was always so on edge he barely slept. He found himself up way too early every morning and was able to do his homework, shower, and actually cook a breakfast for himself before Riku was sending his usual wake up text. Last night was no different, except the blonde wasn't just thinking about that night at the party, but of lips all too similar to his own and the thoughts behind them. Sora walked into the bathroom as Roxas left to go get his shoes and school supplies and head downstairs. Blue eyes met for a long moment before each looked towards their original tasks.

Sora remembered everything.

Roxas could barely catch his breath once he was in his room, door closed securely behind him. He wasn't sure what to do, let alone think. He couldn't fathom leaving this room; he just wanted to stay hidden for the rest of eternity.

"Roxas, are you ready yet?" Riku called from the other side of the teen's door.

_Shit, Riku can't see me like this._"I'll be down in a minute." Roxas rushed around his room collecting his school things and throwing them next to his bag on his bed. He ran his hands through his hair and paused to look in the mirror at his crazed reflection. "You can do this," he whispered at himself, "Riku won't find out, Sora won't say anything. You were fucked up last night, too." He was confident that if he acted cool then maybe things would be alright. He just had to calm down first.

"Serenity now." He huffed a last time before grabbing his bag and heading for the door. He paused, his hand on the knob as he tried to take steadying breaths. "Now or never..." And with that he opened his doors and walked downstairs.

"'Bout time." Riku rolled his eyes and grabbed his car keys off the counter. "Let's go, we're already late." The ride to school was just like any other day. Riku drove quietly, occasionally changing the radio station and Sora sat alone in the back seat. He pulled out a pack of cigarettes about half way and asked Riku if it was ok to smoke in his car. Riku shrugged and rolled down one of the rear windows for the brunette. Roxas sat rigid in the passenger seat and kept his eyes on the buildings they were passing.

School was just as tense for the blonde. He kept his answers and responses short, almost curt and rushed between classes to avoid bumping into his cousin. It was the same evasion tactics he was using for Riku and it seemed to be working pretty well. He was so caught up in this task that he forgot all about his unexpected encounter from the night before.

He felt so confident that this day was going to go without incidence when he walked in to his last class and caught the intense green eyes he knew all too well.

"Fuck." He muttered under his breath, his eyes going straight to the ground to avoid the lingering gaze from Axel. He put his extra books under the desk and pulled his notebook out, trying his hardest to look busy. Axel acted much like Sora had this morning and started his class in the usual way. First there was roll call, collection of homework, then notes and the discussion. Roxas was always so impressed at how involved Axel could get his classmates. Other teachers were lucky if they only had one student asleep in the back, but Axel had everyone throwing in their opinions and ideas. It was mesmerizing how he moved around the class, how he could engage every student as an individual and just make you feel like you mattered.

"So, to wrap up this class, I want everyone to write me a ten page paper relating to the topic." Everyone stared at the redhead silently. "Aw, c'mon. Ten pages is nothing. There are so many things about the second world war you can write about." The whole class groaned and Roxas rolled his eyes at his notebook. He hadn't paid attention during the entire lesson, and instead scribbled away on the page before him. He was face to face with a complex doodle of a dinosaur eating people, mostly the ones sitting around him. "Fine, fine. None of you can write anyway, so instead I just want a short essay. Five paragraphs should do it." There was a sigh of relief around the room and Axel sat on his desk. "So get started, there's still ten minutes left in this class and I ran out of stuff to say."

Axel watched as the students all took out notebooks and opened their textbooks to get started on their papers. Some of them just checked their cell phones under their desks thinking they were discreet. His gaze lingered on one blonde student in particular. He couldn't help but notice this one student ignoring his entire lesson. He looked as if he was writing notes the entire time, but he never once looked up, laughed at a joke, or asked a single question. The redhead wondered if it had to do with their talk. But Roxas had almost always seemed off. Perhaps there were problems at home that were forcing him out of his house on school nights to commute almost an hour and a half into the city just to go to a club and drink illegally. Nothing added up.

The students rushed from their seats as the bell rung while Axel just stayed on his desk. He kept his eyes on Roxas who was slowing collecting his books from underneath his desk. The room was empty in a few minutes leaving the student and single teacher alone in the room. There was an awkward tension between the two for a moment before the silence was finally broken.

"So Roxas, you really don't seem like the bar type to me." Axel raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms over his chest. "Wanna tell me what's going on?" Roxas shrugged and ran a finger down the spiral end of one of his notebooks.

"It wasn't my idea." He finally looked up at his teacher with blank blue eyes. The two held gazes for what seemed like forever before Roxas looked away nervously. Axel sighed and covered his face with a large hand.

"Look, if there's something going on at home I understand-"

"There's nothing going on at home." Roxas looked steadily at Axel before grabbing his books and hefting them up into his arms. "Don't try and pull that teacher bullshit. Nothing is wrong with me; I just ended up at the wrong place at the wrong time, ok?" It was silent again and the two held their gazes. Axel knew that wasn't totally true, but you can't get blood from a stone and students could be the densest of objects at times.

"Well, if you ever need to talk I'm here. We can leave the teacher bullshit at the door." Axel smiled and got up from his desk. "I know what it's like to be your age; it wasn't all that long ago for me."

"Yeah, and I've gotten this same speech from every guidance counselor since eighth grade. Can I go home now?" Roxas started to make his way towards the door intent on ignoring anything else Axel had to say to him. The redhead wouldn't let Roxas have the last word, however, and stepped in front of the door before the blonde could go through.

"Just don't let me find you there with that man ever again. He's the worst kind of bad. Trust me on this." Roxas stared blankly into fierce greens and sighed.

"Fine, whatever." Roxas shook his head and looked to the floor before meeting the other's gaze once again. "I don't even know him. Last night was the first time I ever saw him." There was a pause and Roxas could feel his heart beating hard in his chest. Axel was inches away from him, close enough that he could feel the other's heat radiating towards him. His senses were bombarded by the redhead, the smell of his cologne and the feel of his steady breathing. He couldn't look away from those piercing green eyes that seemed to be searching his soul for answers. "How do you know him?" Roxas almost whispered. Axel laughed and leaned away from the blonde crossing his arms nonchalantly again across his chest.

"I've worked at the bar all through college. I've seen him plenty enough to know he's no good, and you should really take my advice on that." Axel shook his head, a slight smile on his face. Roxas couldn't get over how purely genuine this man seemed to be. "Go on, go home. And seriously, I don't ever want to see you in that bar again." Axel leaned in close, a finger extended in the teen's face. "Not until you're twenty one. Got it memorized?"

Roxas rolled his eyes and finally walked out of the classroom. He was still a little dizzy and couldn't help but wonder why he got so worked up. It wasn't the same feeling he got when Riku tried to get close, but something different. Something... better? He shook his head and made his way to his locker. There was no need to ponder such thoughts as they were dangerous and futile. Axel was his teacher, much older than he was, and knew about his illegal activities. Roxas decided it would be best to keep him at arms length, and what wonderful arms that man had...

"Really, Roxas?" He muttered to himself as he opened the door to his locker. What he needed now was to try and push any and all thoughts of the red head from his mind and concentrate on something else. But what? He put all his books away and sighed. He didn't have any homework or any upcoming tests he needed to study for, so immersing himself in school work was out. His room was clean, so mindless folding or organizing wasn't an option. He shut the locker and started for the front doors of the school. He was slowly walking the halls trying to think of something to do to occupy his thoughts for the rest of the afternoon and was failing. He kept coming back to those green eyes and knowing smirk.

"Shit." Roxas murmured. Halfway between his locker and the exit he had to pass Axel's classroom again. He was about to do an about face when said red head came out of the room and locked the door. He smiled at the blonde as he fiddled with the key in the lock.

"These doors are the worst." He finally got the key to turn and looked to Roxas. He pulled out an iPod and placed one of the buds in his ear. "So where you off to now, Blondie?" Roxas cringed inwardly, and looked away before shrugging. "Sounds like fun. If I made you miss your bus or something I can give you a ride home."

"No, I walk home so it's not a big deal." Roxas was avoiding the gaze Axel was giving him. What was with this guy? No teachers were ever this helpful. Roxas started walking to the exit again, but Axel just followed along.

"Oh." Axel furrowed his brow but kept walking with him. The silence was awkward and heavy with only the echoing of their footsteps and the tiny sound of the music coming from the swinging ear bud to be heard. Roxas was nervous but in a strange way. He didn't feel threatened by Axel and it piqued his interest. Being this close to anyone but his mother would make him sweaty and uncomfortable, sometimes even panicked. But now, walking alone with the older man, he was nervous for a whole new reason. He didn't feel the unmistakable urge to flee, but instead worried about how the man perceived him, what he thought about the blonde. Could he tell that so much had gone wrong in his seemingly insignificant life? And if he did know, would he be repulsed?

Axel stopped and put a hand on Roxas shoulder. Roxas froze and his eyes went wide. He turned slowly and looked up into those impossibly green eyes. "Seriously, Roxas. If there's anything at all you need to talk about, know you can come to me. Anything at all." Roxas swallowed hard and nodded. He couldn't muster words and just stood frozen looking into green eyes that seemed to plead with his own. Axel smiled a real, honest smile and turned to keep walking. Roxas exhaled and followed his elder out of the building. They both stopped abruptly under the awning over the doors. Rain was coming down heavily and small rivers were running rapidly through the parking lot.

"Well this was unexpected." Axel mumbled. He looked to the blonde who seemed to be having an episode next to him.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Roxas ran his hands through his hair and scanned the parking lot. Only a few cars remained and none of them were Riku's. "Practice was canceled? When the hell did it start raining?"

"You ok?" Axel raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Yeah, I just have to walk home in a torrential downpour, but I'll be just fine."

"Want a ride?"

* * *

"Hey Sora. Where's Roxas?" Riku sounded a little disappointed but not surprised. Sora was splayed out on his bed, music playing from his old CD player on his dresser. Sora looked up at him and shrugged but Riku stayed in the doorway. Sora eventually sighed and sat up, gesturing for Riku to come in.

The tall teen closed the door behind him and shuffled over to the bed. There had been this nagging emptiness in his life and his absent lover wasn't helping. He was so lonely and his only companion had been the blow he kept in his pocket at all times. It was beginning to get out of hand. He found himself excusing himself to the restroom in every single one of his classes and he was starting to lose some weight. He spent hours awake at night, sometimes not sleeping at all for days and everything was blurring into one hazy memory. Roxas stopped texting him and meeting him in the hallways, and when he would spot his young blonde he was brushed off.

It was getting easier to ignore the obvious; Roxas just wasn't interested. But why was there such a sudden change? Riku would pace and think and try to figure out where all this started. Was it because someone had jumped him at that party? Roxas never told him what actually happened; instead he would change the subject or just ignore any questions. Could there be someone else? Sure, Roxas had plenty of time to have someone else since he stopped watching soccer practices and games. He didn't even try to go out to any of the twin's parties.

Riku sat on the bed with a sigh. Sora stayed quiet for a moment, just looking Riku over with curious eyes. "Riku, you're shaking." Riku held his hands up in front of his face and let out a bitter laugh, shaking his head at his trembling hands.

"I'm a mess." He said, but Sora shook his head and chuckled.

"Nah just strung out. It happens; I've seen it a lot." Deep cobalt peered into aqua and Riku's face grew cold.

"I'm not strung out. I'm just worried about Roxas." Sora chuckled bitterly and Riku glared at him.

"Your nose is bleeding. Don't tell me you're not strung out." Riku moved a trembling hand to his nose and felt the sticky blood trickling down his lip. He uttered a curse and moved to wipe the blood off of his face. "But Roxas is lucky to have you anyway." Sora reached over the bed and grabbed the towel he used this morning that was still left on the floor. He offered it to the silver haired teen on his bed who was trying not to bleed all over the light blue comforter on the bed beneath them. It never made sense to Sora why everyone always used such light colors in guest bedrooms. He'd been in plenty of guest bedrooms in his life and he's seen just how many accidents happen on the easily stained bedding.

"Ok, so maybe I'm a little strung out, but it's just 'cause I'm so worried about Roxas. He..." Riku gave the brunette a sideways glance, still holding the towel to his nose, "He doesn't talk to me anymore."

"Really? You two always seem so close though." Sora was picking at the threads from a rip on his jeans. Sora wasn't dressed as he usually was, this time there were rips and tears down the entire front side of his right pant leg. He wore a tank top with an emblem Riku didn't recognize on its side. Something about the teen seemed off to Riku, but he didn't know what. "Guess nothing is perfect here either." Sora released a short, bitter laugh.

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Riku raised an eyebrow at the brunette who shook his head.

"It's just funny. Fucking hilarious actually. People thought it'd be better for me to come here and leave my old life behind, but my old life at least made sense." Riku gave him a hard look before pulling the towel away from his face.

"Well, you're life couldn't have been that great if you ended up here." Sora chuckled at that comment.

"My life was perfect. There was always something to do. Or someone." The blue eyed teen smiled broadly, continuing to pick at some loose threads in his pants. Riku knew the look to be one of revisited memories and let him stroll down memory lane for a few minutes. "Drugs came by easy, love came by easy, but it all passed by just as fast. There was never a pause, never a silence. It's too quiet here. No wonder Roxas seems dead here."

"As opposed to what? Roxas has never been anywhere else."

"That's what you think." Sora pushed off the bed with a sigh and went to rummage through one of his dresser drawers. Riku stared blankly at the boy, wondering what point he was trying to make. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his almost empty bag. He dipped a finger in its confines and rubbed it along his gums, sighing as he put the bag away. "He hates that, you know."

"What?"

"The heavy stuff." Sora shrugged and pulled out a pack of cigarettes from his drawer. He moved to the window, opening it all the way despite the rain steadily coming down outside and sat on the sill. From his pocket he grabbed a pack of cigarettes and pulled a thin white tube from the pack and one of the cheap lighters you could find in any convenience store and lit his cigarette. He exhaled and blew the smoke out the open window.

"How would you know?" Riku's eyes narrowed in Sora's direction, his voice developing an edge. Sora just shook his head and took a long drag off of his cigarette. The room was quiet and Riku just watched Sora as the teen kept blowing smoke out of the window. Sometimes he'd even blow rings and watch them grow before the light breeze took them away.

"So," Riku walked over to the window and sat on the floor, his back to the wall. "Were you and Roxas close as kids? I know he used to live in the city when he was younger."

"Not particularly." Sora looked at the ash growing on the end of his cigarette before flicking the excess out the window. "Only when we were very young." To this Riku nodded and a quiet fell over the two again. "Roxas and Elena moved out here pretty fast. Right after they took my dad away." Sora looked bitter and threw the rest of his cigarette out of the window. He got up from the sill and walked over to his dresser. Riku couldn't see what the small teen was doing, but watched him nonetheless. Sora was a mystery to him; Roxas had only told a few stories, most of which were bits and pieces of memories. He knew something had happened and Sora's father was no longer in the picture, but he didn't know details, and he was pretty sure Roxas didn't either.

"I thought your dad left? At least that's how Roxas made it sound." Sora froze and turned slowly to face Riku. His face was cold and angry, his eyes held hurt.

"My dad wouldn't leave me. They took him and left me with my whore mother to fend for myself." Riku's mouth dropped and his eyes were wide with shock.

"I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"How could you? You know nothing about me and my past." Sora seemed to have found what he was looking for and Riku was surprised at how quickly he had switched his emotions. A second ago the little brunette was angry and almost hurt, and now he was light and airy like he usually was. He sat next to Riku under the window, crossed his legs, and placed a small metal box on his lap. Riku watched on with mild curiosity as Sora opened the box and pulled out a narrow tube and a two dollar bill. "Want some?"

"Depends," Riku raised an eyebrow and licked at his lips. "What is it?"

"Just some perc tens. Nothing serious." Sora shrugged and opened his tube and poured a few little white pills into his hand. "I'm trying not to use up all of my ex just yet. I don't get to see my dealer too much anymore so what I got has to last." Sora rummaged in his little box again, mentally counting up a few things before closing it again. He wiped off the top of the box and put two of the pills onto its smooth surface. He covered them with the bill and pulled his pack of cigarettes from his back pocket and removed the lighter before returning the pack to his pocket. "Thank god Elena is never home." Sora murmured before slamming the flat bottom of the lighter onto Jefferson's face. There was a crushing sound and Sora kept tapping the lighter onto the former president's face. He slowly picked the bill up and smiled at his work before using the edge of the bill to form five neat, even lines.

"You're just full of tricks aren't you?" Riku chuckled and shook his head at the scene playing out in front of him. "Why couldn't you just find a new dealer out here? I could hook you up with my guy."

"Nah, I've been going to the same guy since before I started doing drugs." Riku gave him a sideways glance silently asking him to continue. "The only good thing my mother ever did for me was introduce me to Marluxia. Once I was old enough to go out alone she started sending me out get her fix." Sora chuckled and tipped his head down to the box with his money now rolled up. Riku stared at him not sure if he heard what the boy had said correctly.

"Your mom actually sent you to buy drugs?" Sora was on his second line and had to tilt his head back before looking to Riku. His smile was unsettling to the silver haired teen.

"Well, it was an accident." Sora swallowed and Riku knew it was to get the drip down. The brunette leveled his head again and gave it a slight shake. "You see, she had set up an appointment to do a pick up and couldn't get a sitter for me. So that day, we went to the store, then the post office, then to her "friends" house." Sora used the air quotes and rolled his eyes. "She'd leave me in his living room in front of the TV while she went with him into the other room to get her shit. That's how it went for a few years." Sora did another one of his lines before continuing. "I think I was like fourteen, maybe thirteen, when she sent me to get her shit the first time. She didn't say what I was getting; just that her friend had something for her but she couldn't go herself. She gave me an envelope and told me it was for him and sent me away. I already knew what was going on of course, but she had no idea and from then on it just went that way." Sora finished his last two lines and wiped the surface clean of any residue.

"So how'd you get started?" Riku asked after a moment's silence.

"Different story for a different day." Sora was far away already. "So what has you worried about Roxas?"

Riku stared off for a moment. He had totally forgotten the original reason for talking to the brunette. "I just feel like he's avoiding me." He put his head in his hands and pulled at his hair. "I can't help but feel like I'm losing him."

"Maybe you are." Sora relaxed into the wall, his head tilting back and his eyes closing. Riku gaped in disbelief. He didn't expect such a heartless response. "It's not the worst thing that could happen, you know."

"But it is. You don't know what it's like to feel like you're losing the only person in the world that loves you." Riku was angry and was on the brink of shouting. Sora just smiled his blank smile. Whatever it was he just snorted had already hit him full force and you could plainly see it in how robotic he was. Whatever was there opening up to the silver haired teen just minutes ago was gone and replaced by this empty shell of a boy.

"Of course I don't."


End file.
